Dares And Tortures
by M-S The Master Pokemon Trainer
Summary: Ever wish you could dare or torture a Warriors character? Well here's your chance! Sunstripe and Moonstream somehow managed to acquire enough equipment to have a show with three or four crew members! Please keep dares and tortures within K plus.
1. Episode 1

_**And here it is! Dare and Tortures! I will be accepting guests, so send in your cat's gender, fur and eye color! And if you have any kits, you are only allowed to bring two. So if you want to be in the show for one episode, send your cat's and kits' gender, fur and eye color to: 555-555-5552, or just hit that review button which is less fun. Well, enjoy!**_

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Sunpaw: And we're live in: 3, 2, 1… Hello America, Brazil, Africa, Australia and all the other countries I don't want to bother saying! This is…

Crowd: DARE. OR. TORTURE!!!

Sunpaw: Uhh we never paid anyone enough to be an audience…

Moonstream: Hezzo worthless Twolegs! We –cackle- we –snigger- WE HAVE BOOM BOOM BALLS!!

Sunpaw: Moonstream, those would be _bombs_. We don't have bombs.

Moonstream: Then what is this? –Holds up gianormous bomb with timer on 1 minute-

Sunpaw: Ahh! Get rid of it! GET RID OF IT!!

Moonstream: -shoves down Sunpaw's throat-

Sunpaw: -hack-hack- why did you DO that? Wait a second, there's a bomb inside me… AHHHHHHHHHHH!! –runs around in a circle until she blows up-

Moonstream: -pulls up a picture of an old lady with pigeons nesting in her hair- … -pulls picture down and Sunpaw is coming out of a closet-

Sunpaw: Anyway, on with the dares and tortures! I guess that counts as one of the five that is our goal.

Moonstream: YAAAAY! TORTURETORTUREDAREDARE!! –munches on waffle-

Sunpaw: -facepalms- Why are we even hosting together? I'm Sun, you're Moon, I'm sane, you're… not. Ok whatever. –knocks on Closet Of Doom and Ravenpaw and Sandstorm, magically changed to Sandpaw, walk out-

Ravenpaw: Huh? Barley? This isn't fun- what in the name of StarClan?? Where am I? Why is Sandstorm here?

Moonstream: Secret location, hushity-hush. And I changed her back to SandPAW.

Sunpaw: We've got an example dare for you. Confess your undying love for Sandpaw. Well, I guess that's torture too! Alright! Only two more!

Sandpaw: Grr…

Ravenpaw: -turns to Sandpaw- Sandpaw, I have always loved you and always will!

Sandpaw: -bites Ravenpaw on the neck, killing him-

Sunpaw: -brings him back to life- Okay, you two are done. Just step into the C.O.D and you will be transported back to where you were.

Moonstream: Oh, you're Sandy now, and you're Ravencinder.

Sandy: GREAT STARCLAN!

Ravencinder: Cool, bye.

Sunpaw: -leads them into the C.O.D and closes the door-

Moonstream: -presses button and a flash.. flashes in the C.O.D- I pushed a button. =D

Sunpaw: -knocks on C.O.D or the Cod, and Fireheart and Cinderpelt walk out-

Fireheart: What the-? Oh Sandy warned me about this. While I was on my coffee break.

-mumbles- Note to self: Sandy doesn't like getting scalding hot coffee on her fur…

Sunpaw: O.o Okay… anyway, Cinderpelt, you are no longer a medicine cat. You can mate with Fireheart. Actually, you have to.

Moonstream: -holds picture of a bathtub up close to the screen-

**30 minutes later…**

Moonstream: -takes down picture- Okay, the lovebirds are done.

Cinderpelt: I'M EXPECTING FIREST- FIREHEART'S KITS!!! Happiest. Day. Ever.

Fireheart: -nods- Okay, into the Cod.

Fireheart and Cinderpelt: -enter the Cod-

Moonstream: Bye bye lovebirds… Who were those people?

Sunpaw: -facepalms- Ok, one more torture. Hmm…

Moonstream: Ooh! Ooh! Pick me! I know a good one!

Sunpaw: There's nobody else, so Moonstream!

Moonstream: Okay… WetakemyhiddenHuntorturedeviceandwepullNightcloudapart!

Sunpaw: … again?

Moonstream: """.""" WetakemyhiddenHuntorturedeviceandwepullNightcloudapart!

Sunpaw: 8D that was probably the smartest (and fastest) thing you've ever said.

Moonstream: W looks like two vees.

Sunpaw: -sigh- Let's get on with it. –knocks on the Cod and Nightcloud tumbles out, asleep-

Moonstream: -changes Nightcloud to Footcheese-

Footcheese: My Crowy, stay AWAY Whitetail. No, not the foot! NOT THE CHEESE!

Moonstream: Hehehe! –ties Footcheese to Hun torture device and turns crank-  
Footcheese: Huh? Where am I? WHAT IN THE NAME OF STARCLAN AM I ATTACHED TO???

Sunpaw: Well Footcheese, you're on Dare and Torture. You are attached to a Hun torture device.

Footcheese: Who's Footcheese?

Moonstream: You are.

Footcheese: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Moonstream: -cackle-

Footcheese: -gets pulled in half and turns out to be made of wax-

Sunpaw: I KNEW the Erins just put her in there randomly! –throws Footcheese in the Cod while Moonstream presses the button-

Sunpaw: Well, that's all the time we have today folks! Don't forget to give us your dares and/or tortures! And if you want to appear on the show, tell us your (and if you have any, kits') gender, fur and eye color. Only two kits allowed per guest! Bye!

Moonstream: -presses face up against camera- BYEEE!


	2. Episode 2

_**Wow, I got 7 reviews already. It hasn't even been up since sunhigh… Wow. Well, here it is! Chapter 2!**_

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Sunpaw: And we're live in 3, 2, 1… Hello everyone! Thanks for the dares and tortures! We also now have 2 rooms: one for dares, one for tortures. I'll leave the torture to Moonstream…

Moonstream: TORTURETORTURETORTURE- we have a guest. –goes to the Cod and knocks- -a mud brown she-cat with green eyes stumbles out- Hello! Who in StarClan are you?

She-cat: Mudpaw.

Sunpaw: Welcome Mudpaw!

Crowd: -claps-

Sunpaw: Mudpaw, torture or dare first?

Mudpaw: Well, hm… torture is funny… dare is gross _and_ funny. DARE!

Sunpaw: O.o Okay then… We're already in the dare room, so let's begin! –knocks on the Cod and Jayfeather and Hollyleaf step out-

Jayfeather: Uhh Hollyleaf, we aren't in the forest anymore.

Sunpaw: No dur Sherlock!

Hollyleaf: Who are you? –gaspeth- This is a Twoleg nest! It's against the warrior code!

Mudpaw: -turns on anti-nag filter-

Hollyleaf: Blah… blah…. Blargh…. Bloop….

Moonstream: I'll get the tortures ready! –evil grin- -walks away through a secret door-

Sunpaw: Jayfeather, Hollyleaf, you have a dare from Dovekit. –looks at paper- O.O Mudpaw. –smacks paper into the guest's chest-

Mudpaw: Jayfeather, Hollyleaf, you have to… O.O –whispers- mate…

Hollyleaf: We have to…?

Jayfeather: Mate.

Sunpaw: Curse your acute hearing! Ah well, get on with it.

Hollyleaf: -gulp-

Jayfeather: -gulp-

**(CENSORED FOR READERS' INNOCENCE)**

Moonstream: -came just before they started- -lies in fetal position- A, b, c, d, e, f, g…

Sunpaw: -eye twitch- deformed.. –twitch- kits…

Mudpaw: Way to go, you made them both even more mentally unstable! If that's possible for Moonstream… They'll have to go to therapy for five moons!

Hollyleaf and Jayfeather: -stumble, disturbed, to the Cod and go inside-

Jayfeather: -accidentally steps on Moonstream's button before going inside-

Sunpaw: -regains momentary saneness- Let's do another dare before Moonstream gets better!

Mudpaw: -knocks on the Cod and Brambleclaw, Ashfur, and Whitewing walk out-

Sunpaw: Welcome to DAT! Ashfur, you have a dare from ashstar leader of darkclan. You must either… -looks at paper- kill Whitewing or be tied to Brambleclaw for a moon without insulting him!

Ashfur: kill my love… be tied to my enemy…kill my love… be tied to my enemy… Ugh I can't believe I'm saying this, but I choose being tied to _Brambleclaw_.

Moonstream: -regains what saneness she had, being none- -ties the two toms together and laughs hysterically as Ashfur holds his breath and turns blue-

Whitewing: -laughs hysterically too-

Ashfur: -releases breath- But Whitewing!

Whitewing: -snort- I love Birchfall!

Moonstream: I do torture now?

Sunpaw: Sure. Whitewing, can you watch the two idiots to make sure Ashfur doesn't insult Brambleelbmarb?

Brambleelbmarb: Brambleelbmarb?

Sunpaw: Bramble then bramble backwards! ^_^

Moonstream: TORTURE!!

Mudpaw: We better go before she hurts somebody.

Sunpaw: Good thinking. –knocks on the Cod and Cinderheart hops out-

Random Bunny: I'm the only one that does the hopping around here! –hops away-

Sunpaw: Fine, she leaped out.

Mudpaw: Actually I think it was more of a pirouette.

Sunpaw: AGH! WHATEVER!

Moonstream: TORTURE!

Mudpaw: JUST WAIT!

Everyone: O.O She challenged _Moonstream_… She must hate her life…

Moonstream: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!! –leaps at the tiny brown apprentice-

Sunpaw: -holds Moonstream back just in time-

Moonstream: -foaming at mouth- LEMME AT HER!!

Sunpaw: Erg! MEN!! Don't worry Moonstream, the nice men in white will take care of you.

Moonstream: -gets dragged away kicking and screaming-

Sunpaw: -whistles-

-A white mouse scurries out-

Mudpaw: Oh boy! Lunch!

Mouse: SQUEAK!!

Sunpaw: This is Holly, the extra co-host.

Mudpaw: A _mouse_?

Sunpaw: Her payment is seeds!

Holly: Okay, come on, time to torture!

-everyone goes through secret door-

**In the Torture room…**

Sunpaw: Cinderheart, you have a torture from… -looks at printed-paper of reviews- WarriorsFreak! Come stand under this cliff.

Cinderheart: -gulp- Okay.. –stands under cliff-

Sunpaw and Holly: -on top of the cliff- -giggle- -drop gianormous boulders-

Cinderheart: OH NOEZ! BOULDERS!! –tries to run but can't move-

Mudpaw: -at bottom of cliff far enough away- Did I mention I glued you down?

Cinderheart: -gets hit on head and is knocked out cold-

Sunpaw: Be right back! –goes back to dare room and knocks on the Cod- -Spottedleaf comes out-

Spottedleaf: Hi, what's my dare?

Sunpaw: Not a dare…

Spottedleaf: -gulp-

Sunpaw: -whispers in her ear-

Spottedleaf: -nods, goes into torture room, and goes onto a tiny ledge under the cliff-

Sunpaw: -knocks again and Firestar and Sandy come out-

Sandy: -groan- Again?

Firestar: What now? Cinderpelt's kits are due any second!

Sunpaw: -whispers in Sandy's ear-

Sandy: Firestar, let's go on a walk.

-Sandy and Firestar walk till they get to the cliff-

Firestar: -starts singing- Oh Sandy, I love you! I just like Spottedleaf's scent! Yours is sweeter and YOU are sweeter! Spottedleaf never got a part of my HEAAAAAAART!!!

Sandy: Aww thank you Firestar!

Spottedleaf: GRRRR RAWWWWRRR!!!!!! -attacks Firestar-

Firestar: AHH –loses life and comes back with a new one-

Sunpaw: -poofs the three into the Cod with her magic tail and presses Moonstream's button-

Moonstream: MY BUTTON!! –starts kicking and screaming trying to get free from the strait jacket-

Mudpaw: -knocks on the Cod and Crowfeather walks out-

Crowfeather: Hello?

Moonstream: CROWY!!!!!!!!! –kicks and screams even harder- **(I wuv Crowy)**

Mudpaw: Crowfeather, your dare is from WarriorsFreak. You have to eat a moons worth of worms that are covered with dirt.

Crowfeather: No prob. –eats worms-

Sunpaw: O.o

Mudpaw: O.o

Moonstream: -eats waffle with back legs, then resumes kicking and screaming-

Crowfeather: -notices stares- What?

Sunpaw: We got those worms from dirtplace, they had cat poop on them.

Crowfeather: O.O … -barfs- -staggers into the Cod-

Sunpaw: -is about to press button-

Moonstream: -makes her tail really long and grabs the button from her-

Sunpaw: HEY!

Moonstream: -sticks tongue out and presses button-

Sunpaw: Okay, that's all the time we have! Bye! Thank Mudpaw for appearing on the show!

Mudpaw: My pleasure Sunpaw, I would enjoy doing it again!

Moonstream: -breaks free of strait jacket- YOU GOT RID OF MY CROWY!

RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! –kills

Nightcloud and makes her come back. Does it again. Repeats process 11 more times-

Moonstream, Sunpaw, and Mudpaw: Bye all!!!


	3. FLUFFIES!

Sunpaw: We interrupt this program or an important DAT announcement. We-

Moonstream: WE NEED THE STUPIDS THAT WATCH THIS TO ACTUALLY REVIEW! WE ACCEPT ANONYMOUS!!! RAWR!!!

Sunpaw: To put what she said briefly, please review even if you don't have an account. And to put it nicely, non-reviewers are fluffy fluffing fluffers!!!

Moonstream: FLUFFING FLUFFY FLUFF FLUFFERS!!!

Sunpaw: Barkface!

Barkface: Hmm?

Sunpaw: Switch –listens to Moonstream's "FLUFFING FLUFFIES FLUFFERS FLUFFY- to commercial NOW!

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Windstar: Do you wish you could make prophecies too?

Bluestar: I make potatoes.

Windstar: … Anyway, come to StarClan Prophecy Hiring and become a prophecy maker! Let's here a review from a customer…

Random Cat: Ever since I was a kit I wanted to make prophecies, so when I came to StarCl-

-Moonstream comes running through-

Moonstream: FLUFFY FLUFFING FLUFFS FLUFFY FLUFFERS FLUFF FLUFF!!!!!!!!!!!

-Studio gets destroyed-

Bluestar: Must be dead to apply.

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Sunpaw: O.O" Oookay then, as we were saying, you fluffies better review dares, not cats. We have enough guests for 5 episodes! SEND DARES AND STUFF SO WE CAN DO AN ACTUAL EPISODE YOU FLUFFING FLUFFIES!!

Moonstream: FLUFFY FLUFFY FLUFFY FLUFFS!!!!!

Ashfur: Please!

Brambleelbmarb: LET ME AWAY FROM THIS IDIOT!!!

Ashfur: Get me away from this... -gets death glare from Sunpaw, and Moonstream has a flamethrower- nice, wonderful deputy... -eye twitch-

Moonstream: -cackles insanely-


	4. Episode 3

Sunpaw: And we're live in 3, 2, 1…

Moonstream: 0! BLAST OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunpaw: -sigh- Why, StarClan, WHY???!!!

Moonstream: Because I blackmailed them. –sweet smile-

Sunpaw: O.O Okay then… -is about to knock on the Cod-

Brambleelbmarb: -runs through dragging Ashfur along behind him-

Sunpaw: Oh good, you're here, you have a dare anyway, from Stormfur4ever. We'll untie and then retie you with 5 super long ropes. Then Ashfur has to do Brambleelbmarb's bidding for the moon you're tied together!

Ashfur: NOOOO!

Brambleelbmarb: YESSSSS!

Moonstream: I LIKE YAMS!

Sunpaw: -unties them-

Moonstream: -reties them and whispers in Ashfur's ear- Fluff. –knocks on the Cod and a dark brown/golden/ginger tabby she-cat with gianormous brown eyes steps gracefully out, then knocks over a vase-

Sunpaw: Oh, you must be out guest, Ambercrystal.

Ambercrystal: Yes I am. I see you've already started dares with Brambleelbmarb and Ashfur. –knocks into the Cod and every cat ever made in the Warriors series bursts out-

Moonstream: PARTY!! BURN, BABY, BURN! DISCO INFERNO!!

Sunpaw: -facepalms- to the island I guess… -waves magic tail and they all poof to the Gathering island-

Sunpaw: -is on the tree with her co-host and guest- First dare! Umm –looks at printed review sheet- LEAFPOOL! BRAMBLEELBMARB! SQUIRRELFLIGHT!!

-the two sisters named rush over, Brambleelbmarb shuffles-

Ambercrystal: Leafpool, you have a dare from Macey-the-Invisible, who is my creator!

Moonstream: MOONSTREAM-WARRIOR INVENTED ME AND SUNPAW!!!

Sunpaw: Sunpaw and I.

Moonstream: But you're Sunpaw.

Sunpaw: Ookay then, anywho, Ambercrystal, the dare.

Ambercrystal: -was staring at the two insane hosts like they're crazy, which they are- Oh yes, Leafpool, your dare is to feed Squirrelflight deathberries, or –whispers to only her- run around WindClan camp screaming 'I love Crowy!'

Leafpool: -looks at Brambleelbmarb's threatening gaze, and swims across the island and takes off across the moor-

Moonstream: -cackles and flicks her ears, sending WindClan back home-

**At WindClan…**

Leafpool: -runs in a circle around the camp- I love Crowy! I love Crowy!

-Moonstream joins her-

Moonstream: I WUV CROWY! I WUV CROWY! IWUVCROWY!! IWUVCROWY!!

-Whitetail, Feathertail, and Footcheese join in-

All 5 she-cats: ILOVECROWYILOVECROWYILOVECROWY!!!

Moonstream: HE'S MINE GET OVER IT!!

Feathertail: HE LOVED ME WHEN HE WAS AN APPRENTICE!!

Leafpool: HE LOVED ME AFTER HE SAVED ME! MUCH MORE ROMANTIC!!

Whitetail: MINE IS A SECRET LOVE!!!

Footcheese: HE'S MY MATE RIGHT NOW!!

Moonstream: … GET HER!!!!!!!!! –Jumps on Footcheese-

Footcheese: -somehow manages to move her fluffing weak muscles, and kills Moonstream-

Moonstream: HA! I STILL HAVE 11 MORE LIVES!!

Whitetail: How many did you have to begin with?

Moonstream: 20, 21, 22…

**3 hours later…**

Moonstream: 7005, 7006, 7007, 7008, 7009, 7010! I started out with 7010!

Leafpool: And now you have 11?

Moonstream: Yep!

Feathertail: Wait, where did Footcheese go?

Moonstream: Fluff. Thanks for asking the fluffing question Whitetail! Whitetail…? Where's Whitetail?

Leafpool: Where's Crowfeather?

All 3 she-cats: FLUFF!! –Trudge back to the island-

**At the island…**

Sunpaw: That was… odd.

Ambercrystal: -nods, still shocked-

Moonstream: NEXT DARE!! –Grumbles-

Ambercrystal: -regains senses- -looks at review sheet- CINDERPELT SPOTTEDLEAF SANDY FIRESTAR AND TIGERSTAR!!

-The five cats cautiously make their way over to them-

Moonstream: Dare from Spottedstripe: -whispers in Firestar's ear-

Firestar: -gulp- Tigerstar, I have eternal love for you…

Cinderpelt: FLAMEKIT BLAZEKIT BURNKIT ROASTKIT, ATTACK!!!

-four orange kits (along with their father's ex-mate and crush) attack their orange father-

Firestar: AHH OH GOOD GOSH!! –is dying- BRACKENFUR IS NEW DEPUTY!! –dies-

Brackenfur: Yaaay! –Turns to first 9 StarClan cats he sees- Give me lives.

-Brackenfur gets nine lives and becomes Brackenstar-

Moonstream: BRACKENSTAR! BRACKENSTAR! _**(I wuv Bracky too)**_

Sunpaw: Okay, one more dare for every cat here! YOU HAVE TO LIVE UP TO YOUR NAME!!

-Firestar comes back to life-

Firestar: Yay I'm alive! –Turns into a star- Huh? –Burns up- AHH! –Dies again-

-Bluestar turns into a star made of BLUE fire-

-Tallstar becomes a skyscraper hotel called 'The Star'-

-Brackenstar has a star on his tail-tip with bracken on it-

-Sunpaw has flaming paws-

-Moonstream has moonlight streaming from her pelt-

-Ambercrystal has a crystal tail-tip that's amber colored-

-Crowfeather turns into the feather of a crow-

Jayfeather: Oh fluff. –Turns into the feather of a Blue Jay-

-everyone turns into what their name is-

Moonstream: YAAAY! NOW THE CHICKENS!!!!

Brackenstar: Chickens?

Sunpaw: Chickens.

Ambercrystal: -opens cage and hops onto Zatheire, my green dragon-

-chickens with glowing red eyes swarm out of the cage-

Whitewing: -flies up onto Zatheire with Brackenstar-

Moonstream: Fly away Zatheire! Fly away!

Zatheire: - speaks using telepathy- hang on a second. –colors Ashfur pink with Sharpies-

Moonstream: -pats Zatheire and changes Ashfur to Ashpink-

-Ashpink crumbles into pink ashes-

Sunpaw: Good riddance loony! That's all the time we have today folks! See you next time!

Moonstream: -waves-

Ambercrystal: -smiles-

Zatheire: -blows a jet of fire that spells 'Bye everyone!' and roars-


	5. Episode 4

_**Thanks for all the reviews guys! And I waited so I could brainstorm and give you awesome peoples the best chapter possible! Enjoy! And, I'm working on the first chapter of the sequel to Insaneness In ThunderClan! Here's a sneak peek:**_

Wafflekit

_**There! HAVE FUN WATCHING THE EPISODE!!!! And let's just pretend it's been a moon.**_

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Sunpaw: Hello peeps! Sorry it took a moon to film this, but Moonstream got greencough! And she still does! So we have her two (mostly) sane kits co-hosting! –knockies on the Cod and a crimson she-kit with an orange chest and a dark gray tom kit with a white tail-tip and chest come out, followed by Firestar-

Firestar: Wha-?

Sunpaw: I've trained enough.

Firestar: But you don't even have a mentor!

Sunpaw: So…?

Firestar: -sigh- I call upon St-

Sunpaw: JUST GIVE ME MY -*FLUFFING*- WARRIOR NAME!!!

Firestar: O.O Okay… Sunpaw, from this moment on, you will be known as Sunstripe. StarClan honors your smarticalness and your forcefulness. Happy Warrior Day! Hooray! Can I go? –Doesn't wait for an answer and walks into the Cod-

Sunstripe: Okay then. Kits, why don't y'all introduce yourselves?

She-kit: -gives Sunstripe death glare-

Tom-kit: I'm Swiftkit, the fast one. She's Dawnkit, the pyromaniac.

Dawnkit: And don't you forget it!

Sunstripe: -blinks- Okay… Let's get our guest!

Swiftkit: -knocks on the Cod and a black tabby she-cat with purple highlights falls out onto her back-

Dawnkit: Who are you?

Swiftkit: She's purdy.

Sunstripe: -whacks the two kits- Hello, you must be Ashstar.

Ashstar: Why yes I am. Howdy, sure is a pleasure ta be meeting ya.

Swiftkit: She's purdy Dawnkit.

Dawnkit: -rolls eyes- you get to help finish what you started.

Ashstar: -British accent- which would be what, exactly?

Sunstripe: -whistles-

-Ashpink scurries over, playing a xylophone, followed by Brambleelbmarb, who is eating a cupcake-

Ashstar: Ohhh. Wait, how did you whistle if you're a cat?

Sunstripe: I dunno. How come you didn't land on your feet?

Ashpink: Stop it, the both of you! That's an order!

-everyone stares at the gray tom-

Ashpink: Sorry. We were yelling at each other, and I just wanted to be in the conversation. Sorry.

Dustpelt: I don't blame you.

Brambleelbmarb: When did you get here? –looks bewildered-

Dustpelt: I dunno. –explodes-

Dawnkit: Boom boom! FIRE!!! –snigger- TNT!!!

Swiftkit: 'Cause I'm TNT, I'm dynamite. TNT, I'm gonna win my fight! TNT, I'm on a roll! TNT, just watch me explooooooode!!!!

Sunstripe: -facepalms- these are the most _sane_ kits??!!

Brambleelbmarb: I feel your pain. –shoots a glance at Squirrelflight-

Squirrelflight: Squeak squeak! –is still a squirrel-

Sunstripe: Thanks Meadowpaw!

Ashstar: Okay, let's untie the -*fluffs*-. –bites the five ropes binding Ashfur and Brambleelbmarb-

Ashpink: Finally!

Sunstripe: Not quite. Brambleelbmarb, part of the dare was that you could make the time Ashpink serves you longer.

Brambleelbmarb: Yesssssss!

Ashpink: Noooooooo!

Brambleelbmarb: Two more moons.

Ashpink: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! –sobs-

Dawnkit: -threatens Ashwimpydung with a lighter-

Ashwimpydung: O.O I'm fine…

Sunstripe: Okay, two more dares that were Moonstream and mine favorites! –knocks on the Cod and Lionblaze, Heathertail, and all the she-cats pop out-

Lionblaze: What the -*BEEEEEEEEEP*- _**(A/N: That wasn't censored on the actual show.)**_

Heathertail: Knock it off you -*BEEEEEPER*-! _**(Nor was that.)**_

Dawnkit: Bad kitties! –Takes out and lights torch-

Sunstripe: O.o Let's just get on with the show… Ashstar, read –hands guest printed sheet of reviews-

Ashstar: Lionblaze, your dare is from Mossnose. You have to… -looks at paper- kill Heathertail or… -looks- mae with your least favorite she-cat… No wait, that's _mate_. My bad.

Lionblaze: -kills Heathertail-

Sunstripe: That was fast… SLOW MO REPLAY!!

-Giant screen appears and shows Lionblaze sssssssslllllllllooooowwwwwwwwllllllyyyyyy sling around and. Kill. His. Former. Love-

Dawnkit: HAHAHAAAAAHAAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHA!!!!!!!!!!!

Swiftkit: -slowly- hhhhhaaaahhhhaaaahhhhhaaaaahhhhhaaaaahhhhhaaaaa!!!

Sunstripe: -sigh- Okay that was my favorite, here's Moonstream's fav. –Dials Moonstream's number and puts her on speaker- -knocks on the Cod and Jayfeather and all the toms pop out-

Moonstream: To the island!

-Everyone and the phone magically transport to the island-

Sunstripe: -on top of the tree- Jayfeather!

Jayfeather: -sigh- -trudges up to the tree helped by Leafpool- What?

Dawnkit and Swiftkit: You have a dare from SnowsongisaJaypawfan, who is officially the awesomest.

Ashstar: -whispers to Jayfeather-

Jayfeather: -big eyes- No. -*Fluffing*-. Way.

Dawnkit: -holds up flaming soccer ball-

Jayfeather: AHH OKAY OKAY!! –Walks over to Squirrelflight- Hi Auntie, I wuv you!

Squirrelflight: Have you been eating an overdose of catmint again?

Sunstripe: Whaddya mean, again?

Squirrelflight: Well-

Jayfeather: UH-UH WE AIN'T GOING THROU- I'm sorry, please continue Auntie dear.

Sunstripe: O.o I'm getting disturbed beyond repair, let's stop. JAYFEATHER STOP PLEASE!!!!

Dawnkit: SABOTAGE!!! –Holds up torch and runs around-

Sunstripe: That's all the time we have, say tuned for another episode of…

Everyone: DARE OR TORTURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**………………………………………………………………………………………………**

_**Hey Mossnose, know what's REALLY weird? That's exactly my name on the name generator on the official Warriors website! Thanks for all the dares! That was almost five pages! Again, thanks!**_

_**Rock on,**_

_**Moonstream \m/ XD**_


	6. Fan Mail!

_**Hey! Here's a little segment on DAT I wanted to put. I might do it again.**_

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Sunstripe: It's time for… Fan mail! –Dials Moonstream and puts her on speaker- our first letter is from SnowsongisaJaypawfan. 'Hi to you too.' Well hi Snowsong. Did I mention you're awesome?

Moonstream: Let's just get on with it! Read the letter to me.

Sunstripe: This one is from Dovekit-

Moonstream: Oh great.

Sunstripe: -rolls eyes- it says: 'How many dares/tortures can we do?'

Moonstream: Well Dovekit, the answer is sideways 8. (That means infinity)

-A white cat with slits for a nose and red eyes appears-

Albino cat: Everyone knows that Moonstream!

Moonstream: Shut up Logic.

Sunstripe: O.O L-Logic is real…

Logic: Well, I'm standing right here, so unless you've gotten crazier, yes.

Moonstream: DAWNK-

Logic: NOOO MERCY MERCY!

Moonstream: Okay, back on subject. You can send as MANY dares/tortures your puny little Twoleg minds can think of!

Sunstripe: thanks for the letters!


	7. Episode 5

Sunstripe: Welcome to Dare or Torture!!!! Got lots of reviews, so Moonstream-Sunstripe could writ- er _film_ this well!

Moonstream: -bounces on giant trampoline with brown and silver she-kit- this –boing- is –boing- Katkit –boing boing boing- -jumps high and gets her head stuck in the roof-

Sunstripe: Umm need some help?

Moonstream: No, I'll eat my way out.

Sunstripe: O.o' Oookaay… -is about to knock on the Cod but a dark brown she-cat with green eyes hops out before she can- SON OF A *FLUFF*!!!

Moonstream: -still stuck in roof- Hi, you must be Wfreak. –Sings to self- don't you wish your Cod was magic like mine? Don't you wish your Cod were freaky like mine?

Wfreak: How did you know my name?

Sunstripe: She reads Warriors Idol.

Wfreak: Oh yea, I remember your reviews!

Katkit: Eggs.

Wfreak: Ummm…

Katkit: Did you know that 3.756 fourths of vegetables grown are yams? I LIKE YAMS!!!

Wfreak: Why does she speak of such random foods?

Sunstripe: She takes after her mom. ON WITH THE DARES AND/OR TORTURES!!

Wfreak: Is no one here sane???

Katkit: -bouncing- Uhh nope.

Wfreak: Good. –slaps Chuck Norris with a rubber chicken and steals a baby's lollipop-

Sunstripe: -le gasp-

Wfreak: -lick-lick- Wait a second. I don't like lollipops. –gives it back to the baby-

Sunstripe: -le phew-

-A whistling noise that sounds like something falling can be heard-

Sunstripe: ??? –looks up and sees Moonstream about to fall on her- SON OF A… -splat- *fluff*…

Moonstream: -munch-munch- Our roof isn't half bad! Umm Sunstripe? –gets up- What the *****fluff*? Sunstripe, it isn't naptime. –knocks on the Cod and Princess, Cloudtail, Jayfeather, Hollyleaf, Sandy, Berrynose, Cinderheart, burst out-

Jayfeather: Let's get on with it. We're all going to die anyway.

Sandy: -le gasp- Firestar, our grandson is emo!

Firestar: Cluck, cluck, BEGAWK!! –lays an egg-

Everyone: o.O

Moonstream: 3, 2, 1…

Katkit: EGGGGGGGSSSS!!! –eats raw egg and shell-

Everyone: o.O

Firestar –sob- That wasn't unfertilized!

Katkit: O.o –throws up a baby chick-

Everyone: Awww

Katkit: -puts on a spit- Mmmm chicken!

Everyone: -le gasp-

Sunstripe: Anyway, our first dare is from Dovekit. BERRYNOSE, SANDY!!

Berrynose: WE'RE STANDING RIGHT HERE!! NO NEED TO SHOUT!!

Sandy: -punches him-

Moonstream: -kicks them into the torture room- Have fun mating!

Sandy and Berrynose: Wait, what?

Sandy: Nooo! I'm too old for him!

Berrynose: Finally! C'mere Sandy!

Sandy: -mouths- Help me! –gets dragged by Berrynose- Nooooo…….

Wfreak: Moving on… Second dare is from WildstarofLightclan. Cloudtail, you have to start believing in StarClan, or go back to Princess and become a kittypet.

Cloudtail: Live as a kittypet, but not with Princess.

Princess: -sniffle-sniffle- -gets giant anime angry head- WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO LIVE WITH YOUR MOTHER? WHAT'S WRONG WITH THAT?? TELL ME!!!!

Cloudtail: O.O' Ookay then… Umm it would be humiliating to live with my mom when I'm like, fifteen moons. Actually probably about twenty-five maybe.

Princess: B-but but… I'M OLD!!!

Cloudtail: I want to be a kittypet with my own Housefolk!

Katkit: -chews Cloudtail's head off and he comes back as a two moon old kit-

Cloudkit: Mew?

-a female Twoleg wearing an orange T-shirt, denim shorts, and with messy brown hair appears-

Moonstream-Sunstripe: Aww look! A cute kitten surrounded by cats with big, pointy claws! –picks up Cloudkit- You're name will be Snowballkit until you reach six moons, then you'll be Snowballpaw! And you're warrior name will be Snowballfight! Hooray!

All the warriors: GET HER!! –unsheath their claws-

Moonstream-Sunstripe: -takes out a piece of grass and plays a pretty song-

-Everyone relaxes-

Moonstream-Sunstripe: -sneaks off with Snowballkit-

Snowballkit: Meow! Help me! Helpmehelpmehelpmehelpme!

Sunstripe: Did you hear that…?

Moonstream: No…

Katkit: -waves her tail and Princess disappears-

Sunstripe: Atta girl!

Wfreak: Torture from WildstarofLightclan. Are Sandy and Berrynose done yet?

Berrynose: Yep! Sandy is expecting my kits!

Leafpool: Actually only one kit.

Wfreak: When did you get here?

Leafpool: Moonstream brought me.

Moonstream: SO I COULD BEAT YOU FOR BREAKING UP WITH CROWFEATHER AND NOT KILLING NIGHTCLOUD BY NOW!!!

Leafpool: AHH OH NOEZ!!!

Moonstream: I invited a friend for the job. –knocks on the Cod and a black tom with a white 'mask' from the side of his head, across his blue eyes, and to the other side of his head leaps out-

Tom: I IZ NINJA KITTEH! I STALK PEOPLEZ SILENTELY!!!

Moonstream: -whispers in Ninja Kitteh's ear-

Ninja Kitteh: -nod- Okay, Eated Teh Cookie Kitteh. –bows and backs behind the curtain-

Sunstripe: We'll be in the torture room…. BYE! –poofs them all (except Leafpool, Moonstream, and Ninja Kitteh) to the torture room-

Moonstream: FOR TEH REST OF THE EPISODE I IZ EATED TEH COOKIE KITTEH!!!

-Sunstripe poofs them all (besides Leafpool, Moon-err Eated Teh Cookie Kitteh, and Ninja Kitteh to the torture room-

Katkit: -teleports Hollyleaf to Moonstream-Sunstripe's house, where she's feeding Snowballkit baby food-

-a wall of the torture room flips over to reveal a giant T.V. in a tree outside the author-um I mean _director_'s house-

**At Moonstream-Sunstripe's house...**

Moonstream-Sunstripe: Here comes the train!

M-S's sister who will be known as Skygaze: I don't think that's working. Hey look, a black kitty!

M-S: -glares- That's _Hollyleaf_. –kicks Hollyleaf-

Hollyleaf: -goes flying- REEEOOWW!!!!!!!!!!! –crashes through the glass of a conveniently placed old lady's house-

Skygaze: O.O' Nice… Kick…

M-S: Good riddance… -turns back to Snowballkit- Here comes the train! Choo choo!

**In the torture room…**

Wfreak: AHAHAHAHAHAHA!! Serves the little *fluff* right!

Sunstripe: Ditto!

Sandy: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Katkit: The kit is coming!!!

Sunstripe: -smacks her paw over Katkit's eyes-

-A tiny kit that looks exactly like Berrynose with Sandstorm's eyes pops out of Sandy-

Sandy: -starts licking it-

Sunstripe: Aww

Wfreak: So cute!

Katkit: What does it look like? Huh huh huh huh?

Sunstripe: -takes her paw off Katkit's eyes-

Katkit: Aww so cute!

Sandy: Is it a tom or a she-cat?

Wfreak: A tom.

Sandy: His name is-

Tom-kit: You better not name me something like Shortkit or Smallkit! That's an order!

Sandy: His name is Tinybossykit!

Tinybossykit: -le gasp- You're mean!

-All of a sudden Leafpool's screams can be heard along with a strange metal-against-metal sound-

Sunstripe: I don't want to know.

Eated Teh Cookie Kitteh: Let's just say Ninja Kitteh has it all taken care of.

Wfreak: Scary thought…

Katkit: Sure is.

Sunstripe: One more dare. Jayfeather, Cinderheart.

Jayfeather: -gulp- C'mon.

Cinderheart: Okay! -bounces over-

Wfreak: You two...

Katkit: Have to...

Sunstripe: Confess your...

Eated Teh Cookie Kitteh: Love for each other!

Cinderheart and Jayfeather: Oh, okay that's easy. -Face each other- I wuuuuuv you!!!

Everyone: Finally!!

Sunstripe: That's all...

Katkit: The time..

Wfreak: We have...

Moon- err Eated Teh Cookie Kitteh: Today, tune in...

Sunstripe: Next time for...

Everyone: DARE. OR. TORTURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**................................................................................................................................................**

_**G'day mates! Don't worry, Leafpool isn't dead, just severely wounded. No worries! XD Thanks for the cat Wfreak!**_


	8. Episode 6

Sunstripe: Welcome to another episode of…

Everyone present: Dare. And. Torture!!!! –Applause-

Moonstream: I'm not sick anymore! I don't smell like greencough! –Shoves armpit in Sunstripe's face- See?

Sunstripe: -gag- Why the [FLUFF] did you stick your armpit in my face?!

Moonstream: Because it doesn't smell like sickness! And it REEKS!!!

Sunstripe: -cough- [sarcastically] Great explanation! –dies-

Moonstream: Barkface died too, so we got a new cameraman! –holds up a rubber chicken- Welcome Senior El Taco!

Crowd: … -cricket chirp-

Moonstream: -has flames in her eyes- I SAID WELCOME HIM!!! –holds up Dawnpaw-

Crowd: Uh hi Senior El Taco welcome to Dare And Torture! [small voices] Please don't sic the pyromaniac on us…

Moonstream: Good slaves. Now go get me a Sprite. –poofs Dawnpaw away-

Crowd: Yes master… -all walk zombie-like away-

-Sunstripe poofs in with a mottled brown she-cat with golden eyes right in front of Moonstream-

Moonstream: SON OF A [FLUFF]!!!

Sunstripe: Calm down. This is our guest, Lilywing.

Lilywing: -is staring at camera- Shiny… -drools-

Sunstripe: Uhhh…

Lilywing: Huh? Whuzzat? Who am I? Who are you? What are you doing here?!! Am I dead…?

Moonstream: -makes coocoo sign at Sunstripe and pits a waffle against a turtle-

Sunstripe: Well Lilywing, you're on DAT. We (meaning Moonstream and I) are the namers of awesomeness. Like we named SnowsongisaJaypawfan the awesomest.

Lilywing: Oh yea! I LOVE this show! I watch it all the time with my creator, Katie Ladmoore! And… -whistles-

-two kits poof in directly behind Lilywing; a reddish brown kit with bright green eyes and a silver tabby kit with golden eyes. Both are she-cats and the silver one is swimming-

Sunstripe and Moonstream: !! –Moonstream jumps into her co-host's arms-

Lilywing: These are my kits: Hollykit, the reddish brown one, and Sleekkit, the silver one.

Sunstripe, Moonstream, and M-S: -.-'

Hollykit: Hi I'm Hollykit age: 5 moons fur: reddish brown eyes: the brightest green you'll ever see!

Sunstripe: How… informative.

Sleekkit: 'Sup.

Moonstream: I CALL SLEEKKIT!!!

Sunstripe: [Fluff].

Lilywing: Umm these are _my_ kits you're talking about. -knocks on the Cod and Firestar, Blackstar, Cinderpelt, Firestar and Cinderpelt's kits, _**(Kit names and descriptions in below author's note)**_ Ashwimpydung (still serving Brambleelbmarb), Brambleelbmarb, Footcheese, Sol, Hazeltail, Millie, Daisy, Cinderheart, Poppyfrost, Jayfeather, Tigerstar, Lionblaze, and Berrynose burst onto stage sprawled in a big pile, Ashwimpydung on bottom-

Sunstripe: O.o This is gonna be a looong episode…

Moonstream: OWOWOW!!! –runs around like a maniac and stops in front of Sunstripe- The waffle bit my pants.

Sleekkit: The turtle bit my turtleneck!!

Lilywing: You guys don't wear clothes.

Moonstream: Then what are these? –holds up shorts with sharp teeth marks on them-

Sleekkit: And these? –holds beat-up turtleneck up-

Lilywing: Obviously, they're fakes.

Sunstripe: How do you make fake clothes???

Lilywing: With plaster.

Hollykit: … Hi I'm Hollykit age: 5 moons fur: reddish brown eyes: the brightest green you'll ever see!

Moonstream: Well, our first dare is from Spottedpaw13. FOOTCHEESE!!!

Footcheese: -gulp- -cautiously approaches the insane silver host-

Moonstream: YOU MUST EAT A MOONS WORTH OF MOUSEY BILE!!! Oh and Sunstripe, Spottedpaw says 'Hi'.

Footcheese: And if I don't…?

Moonstream: It will cost you.

Footcheese: Cost me…?

Moonstream: -creepy voice- Mo-ney…

Footcheese: -gulp- -eats 5 moons worth of mouse bile-

Moonstream and Sleekkit: I –laugh- can't believe –gigglesnort- that worked! –sniggers-

Sunstripe: Moving on… Lilywing would you like to read it to the victims- er _volunteers_?

Lilywing: Sure! Let's see.. –looks at review sheet- LIONBLAZE!! BERRYNOSE!!

-the two cats squirm out of the pile like worms-

Lilywing: Dare from JayFeatherxCinderHeart.

Jayfeather and Cinderheart: -le gasp- How did she know about our love?? –look around- WE DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING!!!

Lilywing: Anywho, the dare is that you two… -a cage falls on Berrynose and Lionblaze- have to be locked in a cage together! –precious smile- =l3

Berrynose: OH NOEZ!! SANDY!! TINYBOSSYKIT!!! HELP MEEEE!!! –curls in fetal position-

Lionblaze: NOOOOOOO!!!! HEATHERTAILLLLLL!!! –cries like a baby-

Heathertail: Hmph! –steam comes out her ears and surrounds her. When it clears up, she's gone-

Moonstream: …Cool! Moving on… JAYFEATHER!!

Jayfeather: Yep?

Sunstripe: Dare from mosshadow. You have to move in with a goth Twoleg. –giggles and poofs Jayfeather to some random goth's room-

At the goth's house…

Random Goth: Hey look, a cat. I wonder if I can paint it black…?

Jayfeather: -gulp-

Back at the DAT warehouse…

Everyone: -rofls while Jayfeather is painted black and renamed 'Blackie'-

Moonstream: -makes the Titanic, the biggest plane in the world, and an elephant fall on the house, killing Blackie and the random goth dude-

Cinderheart: JAYFEATHER!! NOOOOOOOO!!! Err- poor Jayfeather!

Sleekkit: Can I do this dare? Can I? Can I? Can I?

Hollykit: I WANT TO!! I WANT TO! IWANTTO! IWANTTO!

Moonstream: SHUT THE [FLUFF] UP BEFORE I [FLUFFING] KILL YOU [FLUFFS]!!!!

Sunstripe: -quickly poofs in Lavenderkit and Charmkit-

-all 4 kits immediately huddle up-

Everyone except the kits: -hear the word 'bomb'- O.o

Lilywing: Moving on, torture for… ASHWIMPYDUNG!!!

Ashwimpydung: -scurries over while Brambleelbmarb prances-

Sunstripe: Torture from

Moonstream: JayFeatherxCinderHeart. Who

Lilywing: Has provided us

Sunstripe: Many tortures

Moonstream: And dares!

Lilywing: Your torture

Sunstripe: Is you

Moonstream: Have to

Lilywing: Feed Brambleelbmarb

Sunstripe: Grapes while

Moonstream: SINGING SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW!!!

Lilywing: Oh, and you have to wear a tutu.

Ashwimpydung: -nods and walks over to the Cod- Where is it…? Aha! –takes out a hangar with a full ballerina outfit on it- I'm sure Graystripe won't mind.

Somewhere over the rainbow…

Ashwimpydung: -dances around- [singing] Somewhere over the rainbow… -drops a grape in Brambleelbmarb's mouth-

Brambleelbmarb: -cough- -gag- I said GOLDEN grapes! NOT green! You're such an ignorant [fluff] it's an embarrassment to be in the same [fluffing] Clan as you!

Ashwimpydung: -turns to not-so-hidden camera- [Fluff] you Sunstripe and Moonwhat'sherface.

Back at the DAT warehouse…

Sunstripe: We love you too Ashwimpydungface.

Moonstream: -twitch- Must… resist… urge… to make… Ashwimpydungface… dead again…

Lilywing: Next dare. TIGERSTAR! FIRESTAR!

Firestar: Are you giving me another medal of perfectness? –hopeful face-

Sunstripe: Well…no.

Tigerstar: Haha! –sticks tongue out-

Moonstream: Dare from JayFeatherxCinderHeart. Tigerstar you have to confess your love to Firestar.

Firestar: Hah- Wait, WHAT??!!

Tigerstar: -gulp- F-fi-fir-fire-fires-firest-firesta-f-f-f-Firestar, I l-l-lov-ve yo-u-u.

Firestar: AHHHHHHHH!!!! –blows up-

Everyone: -snicker-

Sunstripe: -brings him back to life- Tut-tut. We need you for more tortures. You can curl up and die later.

Firestar: Aww but I'm behind schedule as it is!

Moonstream: Well this'll speed ya up real quick young'un! Torture from Amberstripe. –poofs everyone to a gianormous arena that looks oddly like M-S's custom stage on Super Smash Bros. Brawl- You have to fight a Blackstar 4x your size. –ties Firestar with rope and forces him to drink shrink elixir- And we're allowed to rig it any way we want! –poofs in Blackstar and forces him to drink growth elixir-

Blackstar: -grows four times bigger- Coolerific!

Sunstripe: -poofs in Amber and Soot next to the ShadowClan cats (minus Tawnypelt and Littlecloud), which have front row seats-

-all the ThunderClan cats and Tawnypelt and Littlecloud have front seats across from ShadowClan and are looking miserable. Sandy, Squirrellerriuqs, Leafpool, Cinderpelt, and her kits are crying-

Amber and Soot: -cackle-

Blackstar: -looks down at tiny Firestar- HAHAHAHAHAHA!! –steps on him 7 times-

Firestar: -is beaten up- Can I go curl up and die now?

Blackstar: -breathes fire on him-

Sunstripe: He's not supposed to do that, but cool! Yes Firestar, now you can curl up and die someplace.

Firestar: -drags his sorry butt over to the darkest corner of the stage- Hic… bleh. –dies-

Lilywing: -looks at review sheet- Two more dares everyone!

Sunstripe: Finally! –drinks some water-

Moonstream: SOL, HAZELTAIL, MILLIE, DAISY, CINDERHEART, AND POPPYFROST! [after all 6 cats get there] Dare from Katie Ladmoore. Sol has to spend a moon in a Twoleg nest with these she-cats.

Sol: 'Kay. It's just a promotion for my part-time job. My full-time job is a dooms-day announcer.

Lilywing: -looks at sheet and whispers something to the five she-cats-

Five she-cats: -big grins-

Moonstream: -poofs them and Sol away-

Sunstripe: And final dare. ASHWIMPYDUNGFACE!!

Ashwimpydungface: -hops over rainbow looking miserable- Yes?

Lilywing: Dare from Warriorperson. You have to shove a lightsaber up your butt or swallow a cactus. I'm starting to suspect Warriorperson is XBlaze Of FuryX.

Ashwimpydungface: -eats a cactus and shoves a lightsaber up his butt- Can my name be Ashfur again now?

Moonstream: No.

Everyone: BYE!!!

Sunstripe: KEEP DARES IN K PLUS OR BELOW!!!

**………………………………………………………………………………………………**

_**Hope you liked it! Yes Blaze, I'm on to you… -narrows eyes- Anywho, here's Cinderpelt and Firestar's kits:**_

_**Burnkit: orange she-cat whose tail is always catching on fire.**_

_**Blazekit: crimson tom that REALLY killed Spottedleaf, he ripped out some of Cinderpelt's fur, rubbed on Clawface to get his scent all over him, and stuck his mother's fur in the old medicine cat's fur. An evil mastermind.**_

_**Roastkit: crimson she-cat with a gray ear. Her fur is constantly getting singed off.**_

_**Flamekit: orange tom with crimson claws. Can't go swimming or fizzles into a little puffball.**_

_**If you can, please review with warrior names for them along with your dare. Please no more kitties!**_

_**Rock on,**_

_**Moonstream \m/ XD**_


	9. Episode 7 OR Everyone HATES Breezepelt!

Sunstripe: Hello, and welcome to-

Moonstream: DaReS aNd ToRtUrEs! **turns to the audience** Ha! Beat ya to it!

Audience: …

Sunstripe: … Anyway… **knocks on the Cod and Cinderpelt's kits charge out along with some random cats that M-S made up while making this** Hi Blazekit, Roastki-

Blazepaw: We're apprentices now! I'm Blazepaw!

Roastpaw: Roastpaw!

Burnpaw: Burnpaw!

Flamepaw: Flamepaw!

Blazepaw: **turns to Flamepaw** Don't play along.

Moonstream: Oh so Flamepaw's the curl-tail! Dangit Dorothy Hearst!

Burnpaw: Who's Dorothy Hearst?

Moonstream: Teh Author of meh favorite book, Promise of The Wolves.

Shinypaw: Anyway, I'm Shinypaw.

Tinypaw: I'm Tinypaw!

Ravenpaw: I be Ravenpaw

Jaypaw: Hey. **Nods**

Moonstream: We will have fun with them!

Sunstripe: Um, Moonstream.

Moonstream: Yes?

Sunstripe: We're doing something a little different this episode.

Moonstream: Uh-huh?

Sunstripe: ……

Moonstream: What?

Sunstripe: …

Moonstream: Just tell me Sunstripe!

Sunstripe: ….

Moonstream: **sigh** Fine. **starts to walk away**

Sunstripe: …… WE'RE BEING THE CAMERACATS WHILE THE APPRENTICES ARE HOSTS SO WE HAVE TO GIVE THEM OUR POWERS!!

Moonstream: … Fine don't tell me.

Sunstripe: Fluff you mouse-brain!!!!!!!!!

Blazepaw: We're waiting for our powers.

Roastpaw: Yea!

Burnpaw: Powers!

Flamepaw: **sits there quietly**

Moonstream: It's okay Sunstripe I'm just messing with you! But I only have enough power to give to Ravenpaw, Jaypaw, Roastpaw, and Flamepaw!

Sunstripe: So that leaves me Shinypaw, Tinypaw, Blazepaw, and Burnpaw.

Moonstream: Yeppers.

Sunstripe: I don't think I can do that Moonstream. Only three cats.

Flamepaw: I won't have powers!

Blazepaw: Yea he won't have powers!

Burnpaw: Flamepaw no have powers!

Roastpaw: **nips Blazepaw on the ear**

Blazepaw: Ow what the fluff?

Roastpaw: Why do you pick on Flamepaw? What's wrong with him?

Blazepaw: Uh-well-um…

Roastpaw: **raises her eyebrows** Only idiots would pick on him.

Blazepaw: But I pick on him!

Burnpaw: Me too!

Roastpaw: I rest my case. **walks over to Flamepaw** You can have your powers and _Blazepaw_ won't.

Blazepaw: Now just hang on-

Roastpaw: **turns on him with blazing fur**

Flamepaw: **his claws are burning**

Blazepaw: Okay…

Flamepaw: **purrs and puts Roastpaw's fur out**

Roastpaw: **licks her paw and rubs it on Flamepaw's claws**

Moonstream: **licks Flamepaw, Roastpaw, Ravenpaw, and Jaypaw each on top of their heads and they start to glow**

Flamepaw: **looks at his body** Woah!! I'm glowy!

Roastpaw: **laughs** Me too!

Ravenpaw: This is so cool! I feel empowered! **flies up to the ceiling** I can fly!

Sunstripe: **licks Tinypaw, Shinypaw, and Roastpaw and starts a stereo with a bunch of funny songs with the first song being Waka Laka**

Tinypaw and Shinypaw: **dance to it**

Moonstream: **swats Blazepaw and he goes into the Cod and disappears** Have fun! **hops onto a camera cart**

Sunstripe: **hops into another one**

Tinypaw: **poofs up the dare sheet** First dare is from Macey-the-Invisible!

Shinypaw: **looks over his shoulder** You're awesome Macey!

Flamepaw: **waves a jar of dirt in his paws** I've got a jar of dirt, I've got a jar of dirt, I've got a jar of dirt and guess what's inside it!

Captain Jack Sparrow: And is a jar of dirt going to _help_?

Tia Dalma: If you don't want it, give it back.

Captain Jack Sparrow: Hmph. My dirt.

Roastpaw: **knocks on the Cod** Berrynose! Sandy! Tinybossykit!

**the three unfortunate victims appear as their name is said**

Moonstream: **zooms in on Sandy's face, which has a green facial mask thingy on it** It's Sandy, the evil sea cat monster!

Sandy: No comments from the pretty, good angels!

Moonstream: Grr…

Shinypaw: **looks at the review sheet** Berrynose, you have to divorce Sandy and kill your kit or put on some pointe shoes, a white tutu and leotard, some tights, and a little tiara and perform in the Swan Lake ballet. You have 10 seconds to decide.

Tinypaw: 10…

Berrynose: Erm, um…

Roastpaw: 9…

Berrynose: Uh….

Flamepaw: 8…

Berrynose: 7.. er, I mean… um…

Burnpaw: 6…

Shinypaw: 5…

Berrynose: Um… erm… **sweat drops are beading his fur** Uh…

Sunstripe: 4…

Moonstream: 3…

Ravenpaw: 2… **quivering with excitement**

Jaypaw: 1… **looks bored**

Everyone: Ding ding ding ding!

Shinypaw: You didn't answer fast enough! We get to pick for you! Apprentices, huddle!

**All the apprentices huddle together and whisper**

Tinypaw: We've decided.

Berrynose: What…? **looks scared**

Flamepaw: **throws him pointe shoes, a tutu and leo, a tiara, and tights**

Berrynose: **groans**

Jaypaw: **snickers**

Ravenpaw: Wow, he never does anything even relatively close to a laugh. **licks Jaypaw's cheek** I'm proud of you.

Jaypaw: Yea, yea don't get sappy.

Ravenpaw: **rolls her eyes**

Moonstream: Moving on…

Flamepaw: **waves his tail and makes a stage appear with all the Swan Lake scenery on it** Come on Berrynose!

Roastpaw: **uses telekinesis to lift Berrynose and his leo, tights, tiara, etc. onto the stage **Berrynose!

Flamepaw: Berrynose!

Ravenpaw: Berrynose!

Tinypaw: Berrynose!

Tinybossykit: Daddy! Daddy!

Shinypaw: Berrynose!

Sandy: Berrynose!

Moonstream: Berrynose!

Sunstripe: Berrynose!

Jaypaw: Berrynose! **Laughs**

Everyone: **le gasp**

Jaypaw: Again with the le gasp!

Everyone: **le yes!**

Jaypaw: **facepalm**

Berrynose: **gulps and starts prancing around to the Swan Lake music, pretty soon he's enjoying it**

At the end…

Moonstream: O.o

Sunstripe: O.o'

Berrynose: ^-^ That was fun!

Everyone else: -_-'

Berrynose: … What?

Tinybossykit: You embarrassed me! YAAAAH!! **attacks Berrynose**

Burnpaw: **shoves them into the Cod followed by an angry Sandy**

Flamepaw: **pushes the button and there's a flash** Next dare is from Eveningshine. **knocks on the Cod** HEATHERTAIL, COME ON DOOOOWN!

**Heathertail gracefully walks out of the Cod**

Flamepaw, Jaypaw, Burnpaw, and Tinypaw: **drool**

Heathertail: **waves her paw in front of their faces**

Jay, Tiny, Burn-y and Flame-y: **follow her paw**

Heathertail: Um…

Shinypaw: Ignore them.

Ravenpaw: Yea… Jaypaw's embarrassing

Roastpaw: So are Flamepaw and Tinypaw.

Shinypaw: Tell me about it… Anyway, Heathertail, your dare is… **looks at dare sheet** you have to run off a cliff, get whipped 100 times, or just say 'I love you' to Breezepelt.

Heathertail: Oh… do I have to say it to his face? I mean, can I write him a letter from Canada or something?

Roastpaw: … No. We'll add another choice: be burned at the stake. Actually I'd choose that one.

Heathertail: But your fur is burned off every day!

Roastpaw: …… Uh-huh.

Heathertail: **sigh** I'll choose the one where I'm tortured least.

Shinypaw: Wait! We want Breezepelt here first!

Ravenpaw: **giggles and knocks on the Cod making a rabbit tumble out with Breezepelt in hot pursuit**

Moonstream: BREEZEY!! **hits the acceleration on her camera cart and runs over Breezepelt** Direct hit! **backs up over him** Yay! **keeps going forward and backwards over Breezepelt**

Sunstripe: Moonstream! That's enough! M-S doesn't want to change the rating!

M-S: **appears on top of Breezepelt with Snowballpaw in her arms** No I don't! **disappears**

Breezepelt: Ow… **sits up with an eye blacker than his fur. Yes, that is possible.**

Shinypaw: Hey Heathertail, it looks like Breezepelt could use an 'I love you' right about now, and you still have to choose.

Breezepelt: **looks hopeful**

Heathertail: Well, I've chosen the one where I get tortured the least.

Breezepelt: **jumps up** Yes! Woohoo! Alright!

Heathertail: The _least_, Breezepelt.

Breezepelt: **freezes, and sits down disappointed**

Heathertail: I'll be whipped 100 times.

Breezepelt: WHAT?!?!?!?!?!? I'M INSULTED!!

Heathertail: You should be.

Ravenpaw: Burn!!

Burnpaw: Yes? **still watching Heathertail**

Ravenpaw: Never mind, let me rephrase that: Breezepelt, you just got pwned!

Roastpaw: Next dare! From… **looks at the review paper** ashstar leader of darkclan!!!!

Shinypaw: **throws Heathertail and Breezepelt in the Cod and presses the button then knocks and Tigerstar and Firestar appear**

Roastpaw: Hi Daddy!

Moonstream: **grabs the review sheet from her** Ookay! Time for apprentices to leave!

**all the apprentices trudge to the torture room grumbling**

Sunstripe: Tigerstar. **whispers his dare into the Dark Forest cat's ear**

Tigerstar: O.o **gulps and turns to Firestar** You're HAWT!! **grabs him and runs through a random door**

Firestar: NOOOOOoooooo…….

Kirby: **flies in after them on Dragoon**

Sunstripe: **shuts the door after Kirby** Okay apprentices come on back!

Roastpaw, Burnpaw, and Flamepaw: What's gonna happen to Daddy?

Moonstream: Never you mind that kits. Just continue on with the show. **hops back on her camera cart**

Sunstripe: **hops onto hers**

Flamepaw: **looks at his empty paws** Moonstream.

Moonstream: **zooms back, hands him the paper, and leaps onto her cart** Hehe I still have some power left.

Sunstripe: WHAT?!?!?!?!?! Gimme gimme gimme!

Moonstream: Ummm, I'd rather not.

Tinypaw: **coughs** Anyway, next dare from SnowsongisaJaypawfan, who is still awesome!

Jaypaw: I have a fan?! They _are_ awesome! **his eyes are shining and there's a heart background behind him**

Ravenpaw: Sorry to crush the whole shining-eyes-heart-background thing but not you Jaypaw, the PO3 Jaypaw.

Jaypaw: **heart behind him shatters and his eyes stop shining** Oh.

Tinypaw: _ANY_who. **knocks on the Cod and Jayfeather hops out** Jayfeather, pretend to be dead.

Jayfeather: Wha-why?! It was hard enough the first time!

Shinypaw: Because you committed suicide now lay down and be dead!!

Jayfeather: No.

Ravenpaw: DO IT!!!!!!!!

Jayfeather: Okay, no need to be so… assertive.*lays down, closes eyes, and slows his breathing*

Jaypaw: **knocks on the Cod and Cinderheart pops out**

Cinderheart: What's my dare?

Roastpaw: Hey Cinderheart?

Cinderheart: Hm?

Roastpaw: Jayfeather committed suicide.

Cinderheart: **has a heart attack and dies**

Jayfeather: Oh my fluff Cinderheart! Yay now Sticky and I can finally be together! **picks up Sticky and hugs her (?) with hearts coming from him**

Roastpaw: Okay, moving on. Jayfeather you can stay here I guess.

Jayfeather: Don't forget Sticky!

Roastpaw: And Sticky…

Jaypaw: I'll do the next dare. **grabs the review sheet and reads **Two reviews from Unsigned. For Now! Jayfeather, they involve you.

Jayfeather: Okay. **stands up and walks over** Yes?

Jaypaw: You must have a long conversation of mushy feelings with Daisy, Princess, and Ferncloud OR dress up as Crowfeather and tell Footcheese and Breezepelt 'Crowfeather' hates them and loves Leafpool much, much more.

Jayfeather: I'll do the Footcheese thing.

Jaypaw: Excellent. **throws him a Crowfeather costume and teleports Jay/Crow, himself, and Moonstream (with the camera) to WindClan camp**

At WindClan…

Jay/Crowfeather: Footcheese? Breezepelt?

Breezepelt: **sniffle** Yea Daddy?

Footcheese: What is it dear?

Jay/Crow: I hate you and love Leafpool a fluff of a lot more.

Footcheese: …

Breezepelt: …

Both: GRRR!!!

Jaycrow: Uh oh… AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! **runs**

Footcheese and Breezepelt: AFTER HIM!!! **chase him**

Jaypaw: **giggles and teleports himself to the studio leaving Moonstream to chase Jaycrow, Footcheese, and Breezepelt**

Tinypaw: My turn! Our next Unsigned. For Now dare involves… *looks at the review sheet, knocks on the Cod, and Ashwimpydung and M-S appear*

M-S: I choose Choice One.

Tinypaw: I'm not even going to ask how you knew that because I know your answer-

M-S: I'm the Authoress and therefore all-powerful!!!

Tinypaw: Right. That. Anyway, to the island! **poofs them all to the island and makes EVERYONE appear there**

**At the island….**

Tinypaw: Hey everyone, M-S has something to say!

M-S: **confidently picks up Ashwimpydung and smiles** Ashwimpydung, I have a deep love of torturing you! **eats him**

Everyone: 8O

M-S: **smiles, pats Tinypaw on the head, and disappears**

Everyone: 8O

Tinypaw: 8O ………………………….. Ummmmm, moving on….. **poofs his fellow hosts, Moonstream and Sunstripe, Hollyleaf, Tigerstar, Willowshine, himself, and a chicken back to the studio**

At the studio…

Shinypaw: My turn! Dare from Whispercreek! Hollyleaf!

Hollyleaf: **scurries over**

Shinypaw: You have to break the warrior code for the rest of your life, or confess your love for Breezepelt then eat him!!

Hollyleaf: Bring in Breezepelt.

Shinypaw: **knocks on the Cod and a tear-stained and bruised Breezepelt falls out**

Breezepelt: You people HATE me!! **sobs**

Shinypaw: Yep.

Hollyleaf: **saunters up to Breezepelt** Hey Breezey?

Breezepelt: … **small voice** Yeaa?

Hollyleaf: I LOVE you!!

Breezepelt: … I just did something involuntary… and messy…

Hollyleaf: **makes her mouth HUGE and eats Breezepelt**

Shinypaw: Ooh! That's gotta hurt!! Poor Breezepelt… Oh well! Flamepaw, you're up!

Flamepaw: **walks up calmly, sits for a few moments, and not so calmly snatches the review sheet** Tigerstar! Willowshine!

Tigerstar: **pads up somewhat warily**

Willowshine: **prances up, not knowing what's going on since she's never been dared before**

Flamepaw; Tigerstar, be nice to Willowshine or be eaten by a dragon.

Tigerstar: DRAGON!!!

Flamepaw: Excellent choice.

Moonstream: ZATHEIRE!!

Zatheire: **is here**

Flamepaw: **points at Tigerstar** Eat him!

Zatheire: _With pleasure young kit. _**eats Tigerstar and flies away**

Flamepaw: Well that was anti-climatic. LET'S BURN WILLOWSHINE!!

Willowshine: Yay! Wait, WHAT?!?!

Flamepaw: Fireheart's kits, assemble!

**Flamepaw, Burnpaw, and Roastpaw line up with something on them burning**

Blazepaw: **appears** I'm sorry Flamepaw, can I help?

Flamepaw: Sure!

**all four apprentices stand side-by-side and blaze as hot as they can, creating a firey inferno**

Moonstream: **makes an anti-fire shield over herself, her camera cart, Sunstripe and her cart, the other apprentices, Hollyleaf, and the chicken  
**

Willowshine: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! **Disintegrates**

Moonstream: **takes down the shield as the four flaming apprentices die down **That was AWESOME!!!

Flamepaw: Thank you!

Roastpaw: Thank you!

Blazepaw: Thank you!

Burnpaw: Yea thanks!

Ravenpaw: Can I do the last dare?

Everyone: Yea, sure, fine with me, go ahead.

Ravenpaw: Yay! **grabs the review sheet from Jaypaw, who grabbed it before it could burn** Hollyleaf! Chicken!

Hollyleaf: Aw man!! **plods over**

Chicken: Bagawk! **chickens over**

Ravenpaw: Chicken, meet Hollyleaf. Hollyleaf, eat Chicken.

Hollyleaf: What?!?!

Ravenpaw: You heard me. Eat it. Now. Alive. Before I die.

Hollyleaf: **gulp** O-okay. I'm sorry Chicken, even though I've only known you for like 5 heartbeats I really felt something.

Chicken: Bawk?

Hollyleaf: Oh well. **eats Chicken and lays 10 eggs** Huh??

Eggs: **each hatch holding a kit**

Hollyleaf: Cool! That wasn't painful at all! I name them Eggkit, Chickenkit, Poachedkit, Leafkit, Lionkit, Jaykit, Warriorcodekit, Tunnelkit, Breezekit, and Bob.

All her kits: MOMMYMOMMYMOMMYMOMMYMOMMYMOMMY!!!!!!!

Everyone: Awww!!

Ravenpaw: That's

Jaypaw: All

Shinypaw: The

Tinypaw: Time

Roastpaw: We

Flamepaw: Have

Blazepaw: Tune

Burnpaw: In

Moonstream: Next

Sunstripe: Time

Hollyleaf: For….

Everyone: DARES AND TORTURES!!!

---

_**Okay, thanks for tuning in! This was FOURTEEN pages long!!! You guys are crazy!! And everyone hates Breezepelt. Poor Breezey… Anyway, next up is bloopers for this chapter! Much shorter!**_

_**-- The Insane Mind of Agent Professor M**_


	10. DAT Bloopers!

Moonstream: **really good British accent** Okay, welcome to a new DAT segment called…

Sunstripe: **pops up behind Moonstream** Bloopers!! The reason Moonstream has a British accent is because when M-S destroyed her (see Sunstripe's and Moonstream's Diary Entry 2), she felt really bad and taught me a healing spell. But it didn't work…

Moonstream: Quite true Sunstripe! Anyway, M-S, our almighty ruler, has decreed that every 7 chapters we show bloopers for the previous chapters. A tiny bit like Wolfstar's 'Fireheart teaches us what to do when' thingy. But this is ours. EPISODE 1!!

_Episode 1 Bloopers_

Sunpaw: And we're live in 200, 199, 198, 197, 19-

M-S: You mouse-brain start from 3 not 200!!!

Sunpaw: Oh.

Onestar: **comes flying through** Super Onestar wuz here!!!

M-S: What the fluff?

Random Person: Take 2!

Sunpaw: And we're alive in 3, 2, 1…

M-S: No, no, no!

RP: Take 3!

Sunaw: And we're live in- Wait! My name is misspelled!

M-S: **facepalm**

Next Scene…

Moonstream: **holds a picture of a bathtub up close to the screen but drops it** AHHH!! **throws herself at the camera knocking Barkface over**

M-S: CUT!!!

_Next Scene…_

Sunpaw: Well Footcheese, you're on Dares and Tortures. You are attached to a Hun Torture device.

Footcheese: Who's Footcheese?

Moonstream: You are.

Footcheese: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Moonstream: **cackle**

Footcheese: **gets pulled in half and isn't made of wax**

Moonstream and Sunpaw: AHHHHH! **Moonstream throws herself at the camera again knocking Barkface over… again**

_End of Episode 1 Bloopers…_

Moonstream: Wow… that Footcheese one was…

Sunstripe: Weird?

Moonstream: NO AWESOME!!

Sunstripe: …

_Episode 2 Bloopers_

Sunpaw: And we're live in 3, 2, 1… Hello everyone! Thanks for the dares and tortures! We also now have two rooms: one for dares, one for tortures. I'll leave the torture to Moonstream…

Moonstream: TORTURETORTURETORTURE- we have a guest. **goes to the Cod, knocks, but the Cod is empty**

M-S: CUT!! Moonstream were you thinking about the guest?

Moonstream: Uhhhhhh no.

M-S: **facepalm**

Random Dude: Take 2!!

Sunpaw: And we're live in 3, 2, 1… Hello everyone! Thanks for the dares and tortures! We also now have two rooms: one for dares, one for tortures. I'll leave the torture to Moonstream…

Moonstream: TORTURETORTURETORTURE- we have a guest. **goes to the Cod and knocks and the door falls in**

**the camera goes to Sunpaw**

Sunpaw: **is rofling** Hahahhhahahahahaha, oh my fluff Moonstream! **gasps for breath** I hope (ahaha) the guest (ahahaha) didn't appear this time! Ahhhhhhahahahahaaa!

Moonstream: **gets up, shakes dust off her fur, then lifts up the door **I wasn't thinking of a furry dark brown pancake…

Sunpaw: **looks up silently** … **points** AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_Next Scene…_

Moonstream: TORTURE!

Mudpaw: JUST WAIT!

Everyone: O.O She challenged _Moonstream_… She must hate her life…

Moonstream: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!! **leaps at the tiny brown apprentice**

Sunpaw: **looking at her script** M-S you spelled 'hi' wrong…

M-S: SUNPAW, MOONSTREAM!

Sunpaw: **looks over at Moonstream who is shaking little bits of meat with brown fur on them in her mouth** Oops…

Monstr: She wouldn't let me do- MONSTR?!?! That's a sick joke M-S!!

M-S: CUT!!

_End of Episode 2 Bloopers_

Sunstripe: **stares at Moonstream**

Moonstream: Don't look at me like that.

Sunstripe: …

Moonstream: Well if you don't like my methods you don't have to use them!

Sunstripe: …

Moonstream: Listen she deserved it!

M-S: **facepalm** Anyway, Episode 3!!

_Episode 3 Bloopers_

Ambercrystal: Leafpool, you have a dare from Macey-the-Invisible, who is my creator!

Moonstream: MOONSTREAM-SUNSTRIPE INVENTED ME AND SUNPAW!!!

Sunpaw: Sunpaw and I.

Moonstream: But you're Sunpaw.

Sunpaw: Ookay then, anywho, Ambercrystal, the dare.

Ambercrystal: **was staring at the two insane hosts like they're crazy, which they are** Oh yes, Leafpool, your dare is to feed Squirrelflight deathberries, or **whispers to only her** run around WindClan camp screaming 'I love Crowy!'

Leafpool: **looks at Brambleelbmarb's threatening gaze, and stuffs deathberries down Squirrelflight **_**and**_** Brambleelbmarb's throats**

Sun, Moon, and Amber: O.o

M-S: **facepalm** CUT!!

_Next Scene…_

Ambercrystal: **regains senses and looks at review sheet** CINDERPELT SPOTTEDLEAF SANDY FIRESTAR AND TIGERSTAR!!

**The five cats cautiously make their way over to them**

Moonstream: Dare from Spottedstripe: **whispers in Firestar's ear**

Firestar: **gulp** Tigerstar, I have eternal love for you…

Cinderpelt: FLAMEKIT BLAZEKIT BURNKIT ROASTKIT, ATTACK!!!

**four orange kits (along with their father's ex-mate and crush) attack their orange father**

Firestar: AHH OH GOOD GOSH!! **is dying** BRACKENFUR IS NEW DEPUTY!! **dies**

Brackenfur: Yaaay! **Turns to first 9 StarClan cats he sees** Give me lives.

**Brackenfur gets nine lives and becomes Brackenstar**

Moonstream: BRACKENSTAR! BRACKENSTAR! _**(I wuv Bracky too)**_

Sunpaw: Okay, one more dare for every cat here! YOU HAVE TO LIVE UP TO YOUR NAME!!

**Firestar comes back to life**

Firestar: Yay I'm alive! **Turns into a star** Huh? **Burns up** AHH! **Dies again**

**Bluestar turns into a star made of BLUE fire**

**Tallstar becomes a skyscraper hotel called 'The Star'**

**Brackenstar has a star on his tail-tip with bracken on it**

**Sunpaw has flaming paws**

**Moonstream has moonlight streaming from her pelt**

**Ambercrystal has a crystal tail-tip that's amber colored**

**Crowfeather turns into the feather of a crow**

Jayfeather: Oh fluff. **Turns into the feather of a Blue Jay**

**everyone turns into what their name is**

Moonstream: YAAAY! NOW THE CHICKENS!!!!

Brackenstar: Chickens?

Sunpaw: Chickens.

Ambercrystal: **opens cage and hops onto Zatheire, my green dragon**

**chickens with glowing red eyes swarm out of the cage**

Whitewing: **flies up but suddenly stops **How am I flying with one wing? **falls still holding Brackenstar**

Both: AHHHHHH!!!!

Moonstream: BRACKY!!!

Brackenstar: I STILL HATE YOU MOONSTREAAAAMMMM…

Moonstream: B-bu-but **sniffle** WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!! **cries and makes a flood drowning everyone including the chickens**

**Suddenly Sirius Black floats down from Neptune**

Sirius: But I want a Ferrari!

**Dumbledore floats down from Uranus**

Dumbledore: No. You're getting a Beetle.

Sirius: But I don't want a Beetle! They're stupid! And miniature! It's like getting an SUV!

Dumbledore: Alright. What's wrong with getting an SUV?

Sirius: It's not a Ferrari, that's what's wrong with it!

Dumbledore: Well you're not getting a Ferrari.

Sirius: But-

Dumbledore: No.

Sirius: But!-

Dumbledore: We're not having this discussion anymore.

Sirius: AGH! I gotta kill somebody! **sees Moonstream** KITTY!! **changes into a dog and runs along Zatheire**

Moonstream: MRREOW!! **runs away**

M-S: **facepalm**

_End of Episode 3 Bloopers…_

Moonstream: **licking a wound on her tail** Stupid canine.

Sunstripe: But I want a Ferrari!

M-S: No, you're getting a Beetle.

Sunstripe: But I don't want a Beetle! They're stupid! And miniature! It's like getting an SUV!

M-S: Alright then, you won't get a Beetle.

Sunstripe: Yay! **starts dancing**

M-S: Or any other kind of car.

Sunstripe: **freezes mid-dance** B-but…

M-S: **smiles and walks away**

_Episode 4 Bloopers_

Sunstripe: O.o Let's just get on with the show… Ashstar, read **hands guest printed sheet of reviews**

Ashstar: Lionblaze, your dare is from Mossnose. You have to… **looks at paper** kill Heathertail or… **looks** mae with your least favorite she-cat… No wait, that's _mate_. My bad.

Lionblaze: **grabs Icepaw, changed to Iceheart, and runs toward a door, meaning to burst through it but slams into it** Ow…

Sunstripe: It says 'Pull' mouse-brain!

Moonstream: I would have made the same mistake.

Sunstripe: AHH SICKY!! **poofs Moonstream back to her den**

Moonstream: **coughs on Lionblaze right before she disappears**

Lionblaze: AHH! OH THE PAIN! IT BUURRNS!!

Sunstripe: **calls Moonstream** Moonstream why is he screaming in pain when all it is is your spit?!

Moonstream: Acid spit!

Sunstripe: ………………………….. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! **hangs up quickly**

Sirius: **drives through in a Ferrari**

Dumbledore: STOP HIM HE STOLE MY FERRARI!!

_End of Episode 4 Bloopers…_

Sunstripe: Sorry there was only one scene; we need to hurry this along.

Moonstream: So please enjoy this next episode's bloopers!

_Episode 5 Bloopers…_

**STANDBYSTANDBYSTANDBYSTANDBYSTANDBYSTANDBYSTANDBYSTANDBY**

_End of Episode 5 Bloopers…_

Moonstream and Sunstripe: … **eye twitch** What. The. Fluff. **both turn to M-S, who is laying on a random couch** Did you remember to put the bloopers on tape??

M-S: Eh, I'm lazy. **pops a handful of popcorn in her mouth** Somfbofy mafe mef chewf (Somebody make me chew).

Ninja Kitteh: **is here** You're so lazy you get an F-- in Lunch!

Logic: **appears** And there's no such thing!

Moonstream: NINJA KITTEH! **throws herself at him and huggles him**

Logic: Hey!

Moonstream: **looks up** Can I help you?

Logic: …

Ninja Kitteh: M- **cough** Moonstream, y- **cough** you're cho-**cough**king me!

Moonstream: **looks down at him** Sorry! **lets go and hops up**

Sunstripe: **sighs** Good thing _I_ was in charge of the Episodes 6 and 7 bloopers. Roll the tape!

_Episode 6 Bloopers…_

M-S: Come on Sunkit! Use the potty!

Sunkit: **giggle** Agoo!

_End of Episode 6 Bloopers…_

Sunstripe: **screams**

Moonstream, Logic, M-S, and Ninja Kitteh: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!! **ROFL**

Sunstripe: … EPISODE 7 EPISODE 7 EPISODE 7!!

_Episode 7 Bloopers_

Shinypaw: **looks at the review sheet** Berrynose, you have to divorce Sandy and kill your kit or put on some pointe shoes, a white tutu and leotard, some tights, and a little tiara and perform in the Swan Lake ballet. You have 10 seconds to decide.

Tinypaw: 10…

Berrynose: Erm, um…

Roastpaw: 9…

Berrynose: Uh….

Flamepaw: 8…

Berrynose: 7.. er, I mean… um…

Burnpaw: 6…

Shinypaw: 5…

Berrynose: Um… erm… **sweat drops are beading his fur** Uh…

Sunstripe: 4…

Moonstream: 3…

Ravenpaw: 2… **quivering with excitement**

Jaypaw: 1… **looks bored**

Everyone: Ding ding ding ding!

Shinypaw: You didn't answer fast enough! We get to pick for you! Apprentices, huddle!

**All the apprentices huddle together and whisper**

Tinypaw: We've decided.

Berrynose: What…? **looks scared**

Flamepaw: **pushes Sandy and Tinybossykit toward him**

Berrynose: **gulp **S-Sandy. I'm divorcing you.

Shinypaw: STARCLAN COURT ROOM!! **poofs everyone to the StarClan Courthouse**

_At the StarClan Courthouse…_

Rainkit*: GUILTY!! **bangs his gavel**

Frostfur: It's not that kind of case! And only the jury says guilty or not! We're just doing a divorce thingy!

Bluestar: Oh shut up you crazy old bat.

Everyone: …

Berrynose: Let's just get this over with… **sigh**

Rainkit: Hang oon! **puts on a white wig that looks like a bunch of rolled-up towels**

Sandy: **rolls her eyes**

Rainkit: Okay, so who's getting divorced with whom?

Berrynose: I-I is divorcing Sandy, s-s-sir.

Rainkit: Okay. DIVORCED! Sandy gets to keep care of Tinybossykit. Has the jury reached a juristiction? Oh, I know. GUILTY!!

Dappletail: It's not that kind of case!!!

Rainkit: Oh.

Tinypaw: Berrynose, finish the dare.

Berrynose: R-right here?

Tinypaw: Yeppers.

Berrynose: **walks over to Tinybossykit and starts eating some Raisinettes**

Tinybossykit: You… eating some Raisinettes?

Berrynose: **smack smack** Yep. **smack smack**

Tinybossykit: Can I have one-

Berrynose: BLARGH!! **shoots a lazer and destroys Tinybossykit**

Everyone: O.O

Everyone near Berrynose and the newly named Asheskit: **scoots away two steps**

Moonstream: Oh that is so going on StarClan News Now!!

Sunstripe: Is there anything StarClan _doesn't_ do?

Moonstream: DAT.

Sunstripe: Right.

_Next Scene…_

Sunstripe: **licks Tinypaw, Shinypaw, and Roastpaw and starts a stereo with a bunch of funny songs with the first song being Waka Laka**

Tinypaw and Shinypaw: **dance to it**

Roastpaw: **watches Blazepaw**

Flamepaw: **pads up** Hi Roastpaw.

Roastpaw: Hey Flamepaw, I'm gonna pull a prank on Blazepaw.

Flamepaw: Really? What're you going to do Roastpaw?

Roastpaw: Well, you ever heard of reverse psychology? Like, where you tell someone it isn't there fault, and they think it is.

Flamepaw: Yea.

Roastpaw: Well watch this I'm gonna totally freak him out. **pads up to Blazepaw** Blazepaw?

Blazepaw: **looks over** Oh, hey Roastpaw. What is it?

Roastpaw: It's not your fault.

Blazepaw: Wh-what?

Roastpaw: It's not your fault.

Blazepaw: What are you talking about?

Roastpaw: It's _not your fault_.

Blazepaw: You're freaking me out man! :[E]

Roastpaw: **whispers to Flamepaw** Come on!

Flamepaw: **walks up**

Blazepaw: **really fast** Flamepaw, something's wrong with Roastpaw-

Flamepaw: It's not your fault.

Blazepaw: … H-huh?

Flamepaw: It's not your fault.

Roastpaw: It's not your fault!

Flamepaw: It's not your fault Blazepaw, it's not your fault!

Roastpaw: It's never been your fault!

Flamepaw: **whispers creepily** _It's not your fault…_

Blazepaw: ……… AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! **screams like a girl and runs into the Cod disappearing**

Roastpaw: … You think we overdid it?

Flamepaw: Yeah I think we freaked him out too much.

Roastpaw: Hey, did he just scream like a girl?

Flamepaw: :) Heh, yea. **holds up a video camera** This is _so_ going on Youtube!

Roastpaw: :D Lawl!

_End of Episode 7 Bloopers…_

Moonstream: OH MY FLUFF I LOVED STARCLAN COURT!! AND FREAKING BLAZEPAW OUT!! OH MY FLUFF!!

Sunstripe: **rofl**

M-S: I love freaking people/cats out. Well, that was the end of the bloopers. (Finally!)

Everyone: **smiles and waves** Bye!


	11. IMPORTANT AN

**Okay, before you say **_**anything**_** about the guidelines, let me say this: This is IMPORTANT!**

**I will not be on for the weekend, when most of you will be updating/reading, because I'm going to my cousins' house tomorrow and staying till Sunday, and they live in the state next-door. So, I will not be dead, just… ceasing… to… exist… **_**I blink**_** Oh yea, I'm recording this from prison with Cinderpaw. It's not fun. Well, bye for the weekend.**

**-- The Insane Mind of Professor Agent M**


	12. Importantness

Spelling Ex. 6B and 6C

1. d

2. b

3. a

4. a

5. c

6. a

7. d

8. b

9. b

10. a

11. c

12. d

13. b

14. a

15. b

16. b

17. b

6C

1. depressed pensive

2. barb

3. curios enlighten

4. snob enveloped

5. languished ramshackle

6. essay untimely

7. babble daunt

8. aviary

9. brash advance

Moonstream: M-S THIS IS YOUR SPELLING!!!

M-S: Whoops! Sorry about this hideous display viewers. This will be fixed in about three weeks. Or less.

Sunstripe: **rolls her eyes** As long as you get it done.


	13. IMPORTANT Pollmabobber

M-S: This is-

Sunstripe: The _real_ important thing! **growls at M-S**

M-S: **whimpers slightly, then regains her composure** Yes, we want to know-

Moonstream: Do you, the viewers, want us to change this show from text format to story format or keep it the same? **points her finger while wearing an Uncle Sam outfit (including beard)** We need _you_ to vote!

M-S: **rolls her eyes, laughing** Right, whatever. You heard the cats, tell us what you think. And please, none of that 'guidelines' junk. We want _your_ opinion, not Fanfiction's. **jumps onto her bean bag chair and sighs in relief **Oh yea, we need it soon. Because I have a _great_ idea, and I need to know if it's gonna be chat format or story. Also, if you sent in a guest cat that we haven't used yet, we'd like to know if it's okay if they guest with other cats. If not, then you're just gonna have to wait.

Moonstream: You might be waiting a long time. **shrugs**


	14. Episode 8!

**Seems that script format is the winner! Oh, and WereCatsRule, it's not TEXT text. This is TEXT text:  
**

**Moonstrm: Srry pplz but we g2g save M-S! B back l8er!**

**This is how I do it:  
**

**Moonstream: Sorry peoplez but we gotta go save M-S! Be back later!**

**So it's not really text. Let's get this show on the road!**

---

Moonstream: **eating turtle chocolate** Yum…

M-S: **stands next to Sunstripe wearing a Santa hat. She rings a bell **Merry Christmas! And welcome to…

Audience: DaReS aNd ToRtUrEs!

Moonstream: O.o How'd you- never mind. **finishes her chocolate and throws it behind her**

Ashwimpydung: Ow!

Moonstream: HAHA!

Sunstripe: And now our guests! **knocks on the Cod and two she-cats, along with a kit, come out**

M-S: **bows** Welcome Stormflower, Dreamfeather, and Nightkit.

Stormflower: **points** OH EM GEE TWOLEG EVERYONE RUN FOR YOUR LIIIIIIIVES!!!

Cat Audience: **scream and start running around**

Dreamfeather: **looks at Nightkit, then grabs her** EVERY CAT FOR HIM/HERSELF!!! **runs toward the entrance**

M-S: **facepalms **Delta formation…

Sunstripe: **jumps onto M-S's head**

Moonstream: **jumps on top of Sunstripe's head. She takes a deep breath and yowls,** QUIET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Everyone stops**

Moonstream: **smiles** Thank you. **jumps down**

Sunstripe: **groans as she jumps down** I hate Delta formation…

M-S: At least you're not on bottom! **Whimpers** I have a sensitive scalp…

Sunstripe: **blinks** Erm, anyway… We're gonna use some dares that we haven't yet. So you best SIT YOUR PATOOTIES DOWN!!!

**The audience hurries to their seats, and you can spot an exotic silver tabby, Spottedstripe, who is waiting for her guest appearance. You can also see Wildstar, a blue-green she-cat* with green-amber eyes, Icestream and her friend Briarthorn, Limegaze, who we're guessing has green eyes, Whispercreek, Autumnleaf and her kits, Snowcloud, Earthwhisper, Moonfur, and Snowpaw**

Moonstream: I never realized how long our guest line was. Hey Snowpaw, Icestream, and Briarthorn come on up!

Audience: claps as they pad onto the stage

Sunstripe: So now… A dare from Stormfur4ever! Ashwimpydung! Brambleelbmarb! Squirrellerriuqs! Calls

The three torture victims edge forward. Ashwimpydung tries to hide behind Brambleelbmarb, but Moonstream grabs him

Moonstream: Oh Ashwimpydung… smiles sweetly

Ashwimpydung: scared Wh-wh-what…? Oh, clean up on aisle 3…

Moonstream: EW!! OH MAN THAT'S NASTY!! hits Ashwimpydung over the head with a stick

Ashwimpydung: Ow! I was kidding, gosh! rubs his head with one eye now squinting What is it?

Moonstream: We're changing your name!

Ashwimpydung: eye sparkles hopefully Ashfur?

Moonstream: No.

Ashwimpydung: Ashpelt?

Sunstripe: **shakes her head** Nada.

Ashwimpydung: **groans** Something insulting?

M-S: Yup! **says cheerfully** Ashwimpydung is too long, so now it's just Ashfodder!

Ashfodder: NOOOOOOOOOO!! **shouts like Darth Vader**

Hosts, co-hosts, and Authoress: **laugh**

Dreamfeather: And now the dare **reads** Brambleelbmarb and Squirrellerriuqs, go on a date.

Two backwards names: Okay! **disappear to a fancy restaurant**

Ashfodder: And I guess I go watch?

Icestream: **nods**

Ashfodder: **disappears**

At the retaurante…

Moonstream: **pads over to Brambleelbmarb and Squirrellerriuqs** How may I help you this fine evening?

Brambleelbmarb: **holds his mate's paws** Um… Can you hold open the menu for us?

Moonstream: **rolls her eyes and holds the menu in front of her face**

Squirrel and Bramble: **study it, still holding paws**

Moonstream: **mutters French insults under her breath behind the menu**

Ashfodder: **watches in a niche in the wall**

Squirrellerriuqs: We'll have the escargot.

Brambleelbmarb: With peanut butter! :3

Moonstream: Very well. **snaps the menu shut louder than needed. She then walks into the kitchen **COOKED SNAILS WITH PEANUT BUTTER!!

Squirrellerriuqs: What are snails…?

Brambleelbmarb: Beats me. Bet they're good though!

Snowpaw: **starts to cook the snails while Nightkit prepares the peanut butter**

Squirrellerriuqs: I love you Brambleelbmarb! **starts licking his face fiercely**

Moonstream: **yells** RATING!!!

Squirrellerriuqs: Yea yea… **continues**

Sunstripe: **makes a gagging motion and swings the camera to Ashfodder**

Ashfodder: **twitches uncontrollably watching Squirrel and Bramble**

M-S: **bad Australian accent** And here we have the rare Twitchosaurus. Crikey, he's a Tripletwitchosaurus! What a lucky find! Finding rarities is a didgeridoo!

Brambleelbmarb: **purrs loud enough to be heard in China**

In China…

Chinese dude: **hears a purring** Ho? HA CHIKICHOO WASOO!!!

Restaurante…

Moonstream: **blink. Blink blink** Well, let's just speed this on… **grabs her remote and hits fast-forward**

Picture go fast**…

**"Ihatemyjob."*****

Picture go regular**…

Briarthorn: Next dare! **grabs the paper from Icestream, who in turn glares at her friend** Moonstream! Jayfeather!

Moonstream: **blinks in surprise as she walks up** I didn't know I had a dare.

Sunstripe and M-S: **snicker**

Jayfeather: **pads up**

Moonstream: **glances sideways at Jayfeather with a genuine sweet smile**

Jayfeather: **looks afraid**

Briarthorn: Moonstream, you have to-

Icestream: **bumps Briarthorn away** You have to-

Briarthorn: **tackles Icestream** Have to-

Both: FALL IN LOVE WITH JAYFEATHER!!

Moonstream: YAY!!! **jumps on Jayfeather**

Wolfstreak: **cries**

Moonstream: **sticks her tongue out and drags Jayfeather away**

Sticky: **cries- wait, what?!**

Audience: **le gasp** O.o

Jayfeather: **claws the floor** Nooo!

M-S: **bars their way** Wait! There was two parts of the dare. Moonstream had to fall in love with Jayfeather, OR—

Moonstream: **drops Jayfeather** WHAT?! OR WHAT?!?!

M-S: Or the other way around!

Jayfeather: **gulps**

Sunstripe: **floats down attached to a rope and wearing a Cupid outfit. She has a bow and arrow. The tip of the arrow is a heart. She shoots it and hits Jayfeather's flank**

Jayfeather: **drools slightly, then shakes his head. He looks at Moonstream with admiring eyes** I LOVE YOU!!

Moonstream: **grins widely, purrs, and drags him into a random door and disappears**

Everyone: O.o

Cinderheart, Wolfstreak, Willowshine, and Sticky: **sit in a corner and cry on each other's shoulders. Except Sticky, since she doesn't have a shoulder**

Sunstripe: This is tied for the weirdest day of my life.

M-S: Tied with what?

Sunstripe: EVERY OTHER FLUFFING DAY OF MY LIFE!!

M-S: **facepalm** Anyway, Stormflower, care to read the next dare—

Stormflower: **grabs the paper before she can finish** This dare is from Laterose13 **(I know this is kinda late but good job getting an account! **_**thumbs up**_**)** so Ashfodder and Randomkit come on down!!

**Ashfodder plods up, followed by a rainbow-striped kit**

M-S: I know we already used this but: Randomkit, meet Ashfodder. Ashfodder, eat Randomkit.

Randomkit: **eyes widen** NO! DON'T EAT ME!! Look, I'm rainbow!

Ashfodder: Which makes me want to eat you that much more!

Randomkit: NOOOO—

Ashfodder: **cuts him off by gobbling him up**

Sunstripe: **snickers** Now the other part.

Ashfodder: Other…. Part?

Moonstream: **appears, nods and snaps her tail-tip**

Randomkit: **suddenly grows, still inside Ashfodder, ten times bigger than a normal cat**

Ashfodder: **becomes huge, and then explodes**

Sunstripe: **giggle** I love seeing it but putting no detail. **bats a piece of gray fur away from her face**

M-S: **puts all the pieces in a wheelbarrow and pushes it into the dare room*** then returns** The medicine cats are on it.

Moonstream: **holds up her paw** Ooh! Ooh! I'm good at jigsaw puzzles!

Nightkit: **snickers with Snowpaw**

Snowpaw: M-m-my t-tu-tur—

Moonstream: **pulls the pin on a grenade and throws it up**

Sunstripe: MOONSTREAM WHY DID YOU—

Moonstream: Wait for it…

Grenade: **explodes and throws powdered Shy-B-Gone on everyone**

Snowpaw: **shakes her head and sneezes** My turn to read a dare!! **grabs the paper** Dare from…XxRandom NemesisxX! Tigerstar, Bluestar!!

**The two walk forward**

Snowpaw: **looks over at Sunstripe, who nods slightly** Bluestar, you're now Bluecrazy. Tigerstar, you're now—

Nightkit: **jumps up** You're Tigerbunny!

Tigerbunny: _TIGERBUNNY_?!

Bluecrazy: **giggles almost uncontrollably**

Snowpaw: Onto the dare! Tigerbunny, make out with Bluecrazy.

Bluecrazy: **stops giggling immediately** Bluecrazy kiss Tigerbunny? Bluecrazy no like Tigerbunny!

Moonstream: Too bad! **says as edging toward the camera**

Senior El Taco: **gulps**

Tigerbunny: **puckers his 'lips' and leans toward Bluecrazy with his eyes closed**

Moonstream: WAIT!! **throws herself at the camera and knocks it over** Better! **waits a little and then helps the camera and Senior El Taco up** There we go!

Tigerbunny: **crying, literally**

Bluecrazy: **curled in the fetal position** BLUECRAZY SCARED!!!

Sunstripe: **teleports them into the Cod and presses the button**

Nightkit: My turn!!! **looks at the paper, which is as tall as her** Dare from… Wildpelt! Lionblaze, Heathertail!

**The two haters pad up**

Nightkit: **whispers in Lionblaze's ear**

Lionblaze: **gulps** H-Heathertail, wi-will you go o-out wi-with me?

Heathertail: **snorts and bites his head off before disappearing**

Sunstripe: O.o Wow…

Moonstream: **pushes away the headless, but still living, Lionblaze** And now Sunstripe's turn!

Sunstripe: **takes the paper from Nightkit and reads** Dare from… MyMusesSpeakToMe!

Moonstream: Do they?! O.o

Sunstripe: Anyway, Crowfeather, Firestar, Jayfeather, Ashfodder, and Flamepaw, come on dooown!

**The five 'volunteers' walk up**

Moonstream: Wildstar, come on!

**A she-cat appears**

Wildstar: YAY!!! **hugs all the torture cats**

Ashfodder: **screams** LOVE!! AFTER ALL THIS TIME OF WANTING IT, IT _**BURNS**_!!

Wildstar: **stops and steps back** Now Crowfeather, come with me and collect your prize as the First Emo Cat! **grabs Crowfeather's paw and flies away**

Crowfeather: HELP ME!!!!!

Everyone: **blink**

Moonstream: **grins evilly** And now a special ending concocted by M-S, Sunstripe, and me! ASHFODDER, FOOTCHEESE!!!

**Footcheese appears in the Cod and pads over on one side while Ashfodder does on the other side**

Footcheese: I-it's been a while, Moonstream.

Moonstream: **glares with burning eyes** About five moons.

Sunstripe: Anyway, guests you're done. You can go back to the audience now.

Guests: **nod and find places in the audience**

Moonstream and Sunstripe: **both jump on the two torture cats and put chipmunk costumes on them**

Footcheese: **stares down at her costume** FATNESS!! 8O

Ashfur: :| At least you have a tail… **looks down at his own tail-less costume**

Footcheese: FATNESS! 8O

Moonstream: Footcheese thy name is now Nightfat!

Nightfat: FATNESS! 8O

Sunstripe: Yes… **turns on a stereo that plays Umbrella Beach by Owl City repeatedly**

Snape, Sirius, and Dumbledore: **float down from Pluto, Neptune, and Uranus, and start to dance**

Snape: **puts on a hot-pink wig**

Sirius: **barks while still in human-form**

Dumbledore: **gets his boogie on**

Everyone else: :O …

Moonstream: **glares at Ashfodder and Nightfat** And why aren't _you two_ dancing?

Ashfodder and Nightfat: **jump, then start to dance, doing a synchronized disco**

The three Harry Potter characters and the two victims: **do the 'We're All in This Together' dance synchronized**

Moonstream, M-S, and Sunstripe: **ROFL**

Everyone else: **stare with wide eyes**

Dancers: **finish and bow**

Moonstream: **jumps up** And thank you

Sunstripe: For watching

M-S: This episode of…

Everyone: DaReS aNd ToRtUrEs!!!!!!!

M-S: **rings a bell while still wearing that Santa hat** And…

Everyone: **sing** We wish you a Merry Christmas! We wish you a Merry Christmas! We wish you a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year!!! **Laugh**

**---  
**

* We're guessing it's a she.

** Monk!! **cries**

*** If you can tell me what that says with correct: Spelling, grammar, punctuation, and capitalization, you can have a plushie of your choice plus an Ashfodder voodoo doll!


	15. MS Speaks!

**I bow deeply.** Greetings. You are about to experience my rants, theories, and anything else my twisted mind can conjure. Enjoy.

---

M-S: **blinks, her face solemn** Hello. This is my many theories and rants. Before I begin, I just want you to know that none of this should be taking personally. I'm just blowing off some steam. I also want to warn you of many spoilers, so read at your own risk. Now I may begin.

**The Whitewing Conspiracy**

M-S: Dovepaw is _not_ "kin of Firestar's kin"! She's kin of Firestar's kin! Whitewing is the only one besides Hollyleaf, who is dead. But Whitewing obviously isn't the One. **shakes her head** That's another thing. Dovepaw is too perfect! I'm actually considering not getting the rest of the Omen of the Stars books!

Moonstream: Courage!

M-S: *cough*shutup*cough* Anyway, another thing:

**The Hollyleaf Plot**

M-S: Why did Hollyleaf have to die? She was pretty cool despite the whole warrior-code-must-always-be-followed thing! Erin Hunter is on the verge of ruining the Warriors series! **sits down and sighs** Why? WHY?!

Sunstripe: I ask the same thing about Moonstream.

M-S: Both of you get out of here!

Sunstripe: But we're recording this!

Moonstream: Yea! Plus, my chicken soup isn't ready yet!

Sunstripe and M-S: O.o ...

Moonstream: Sackapotato!

M-S: -_-' _Anyway_, back on topic. I was about to throw The Fourth Apprentice across my room before I was halfway done! **puts her head in her face** Sad days... **whimpers**

Sunstripe: **pats M-S's back** It's okay...

M-S: **jumps up** Okay, now something else.

**Rating Change**

M-S: We _never_ will change the rating from K plus.

Sunstripe: We also get a ton of reviews for this. And a lot are from one dude named JayFeatherxCinderHeart. We'll just call 'em Jay.

Moonstream: What's the matter with ya Jay?!

M-S: Be quiet, Jay loves us.

Moonstream: Well I love Mr. Woolie but you don't see me sending him 10 reviews a day!

Sunstripe: Who's Mr. Woolie?

Moonstream: This spokesperson for the Lamb of the Month club! **holds up a plush lamb. She squeezes his stomach**

Mr. Woolie: I'm delicious!

Moonstream: **bites the lamb's ear making a growl noise**

Sunstripe: Put the pig away.

Moonstream: **throws the pig to the side, out of camera view**

M-S: ... Alright, back on topic. Jay, I'm going to be frank. Most of your reviews are T rated, not K plus. Please lower the intensity of your tortures, please.

Moonstream: You said please twice.

M-S: So it would sink in. Duh.

Sunstripe: There's also someone else that needs a lecture!

M-S: Right. Moonstream, you can have the honors of this one.

Moonstream: Oh boy!

Sunstripe: **mutters** Oh joy...

Moonstream: Alright, Jayfeather Fan19, I have a bone to pick with you! Seriously, your dare with Jayfeather, Cinderheart, and their kits? Not K plus. And there's an announcement! Sunstripe...?

Sunstripe: We are not accepting anymore guest cats! Please, please, _please_ do not send in anymore cats! Only dares! Thank you!

M-S: And, if you like Star Wars, I've started a spoof. But I may not continue. I need you to tell me!

Moonstream: Please!

Sunstripe: Think of the children...

All three: **sad faces**

M-S: And we will now proceed to dance like morons!

**Everyone including: M-S, Moonstream, Sunstripe, Lavenderpaw, Eclipsepaw, Lightningpaw, Rabbitpaw, Charmpaw, Ashpaw, Wafflepancake, Dawnflame, Duskadder, Wolfstreak, Aspendapple, Starblaze, Swiftthorn, Skygaze, Tigerstar (M-S's dad), Sunsetpelt, Wildpaw, Bramblepaw, Spottedpaw, Brightflame, and all my other characters that I don't care to name dance to Numa Numa**


	16. Special Announcement of Epicness!

M-S: *blows nose* Sniff... Greetings, audience. We're gathered here today to honor an 8-episode cluttered mess: Dares and Tortures... *drones on and on*

Moonstream: *wails and uses Ninja's tail as a handkerchief* Waaaah!

Ninja: *pats her on the back, unfazed by the snot dripping from his tail and tearless, but sad* There, there...

Logic: Hmph. *stands emotionless*

Sunstripe: *dancing wildly and spazzmatically* Woo! Finally! I can go _home_! Goodbye fluffers!

M-S: *glares* As I was _saying_, I say to you, the audience, please, stay tuned for...

Sunstripe: Yea! Woohoo!

M-S: For-

Sunstripe: Finally! Gone!

M-S: FOR THE SECOND SEASON OF DAT!

Sunstripe: *freezes* Lolwut? *eye twitch*

Moonstream: WOO! BOOYAHHH! *huggles Katkit*

Katkit: Yaaaaaaaaay!

Swiftkit: Yay. Wait... am I a kit again? Why is that? Why do you hate me? *tail twitch*

M-S: Alright, everyone, clear all the cluttered junk out of the warehouse, we're starting over!

Everyone but Sunstripe: Hooray! *fist pumps and stampede to the warehouse*

Sunstripe: Eh...?

Moonstream: *picks up a wax piece of Footcheese, stares, and then takes a bite out of it* Rawr. *tosses it in the burn pile*

All the Clan cats: *appear*

Firestar: Wha?

M-S: CLEAN!

Ashfodder: Yes ma'am. *drags Brambleelbmarb, to whom he is once again chained, to the warehouse and begins cleaning*

Ninja: *begins scraping gunk off of the ceiling, and patches up the hole Moonstream made in Episode 5* Good times... *mutters to self*

Logic: *stands next to M-S, also doing nothing* Should we be helping...?

M-S: Nah. Too lazy. *whips out a Twix* Anyway, see you all in...

Everyone but Sunstripe: *turns and yells* SEASON TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Sunstripe: *topples over*


End file.
